sense n sensibility

realised that its been close to 2 months since my last entry. have been busy wif life n work...but then whats new rite. am really really longing for some quality time wif my spider..but that hasnt happened just yet. i've a feeling its not gonna materialise.

i've always prided myself for being sensible. or rather..i've always thought that sensibility is a trait thats highly desired. so i've acted sensibly most times. even when at times i'm just burning to scream at things...to express my unhappiness at the way things turned out...to vent my anger...to act negative. but my sensible side usually wins. and when it doesnt, the results r bad. i'll be chastised. or it'll be made known to me that my behavour's disappointing. so i learned my lesson. i'm always positive. i keep my negative feelings to myself. pray i dont explode.

what do people do here in singapore? we dont exactly hv much options. we wake up in the morning and go to work. after work, go straight home for dinner, watch tv, sleep. if we're lucky we have plans after work, but even then theres not much options. dinner, movies, shopping, coffee. go clubbing/pubbing for the night-crawling ones. then back home to watch tv, sleep.

weekends r different. you have 2 full days to yrself. the possibilities r endless. theres the outdoor activities u can indulge in....swimming..cycling..walks along the beach. or the more sedentary ones...waking up late..reading the papers...or just plain reading. but of cos theres a difference having someone doing these things wif you, and doing them on yr own. weekends r special, to me at least. i dont mind not having any plans after work on a weekday. i dont mind going home straight after work. but weekends r something different. i want company. i want to be able to do things. even if all i do is read, i dont wanna be reading alone. i dont want to be locked up in my room reading my books!

i'm sad yet pissed off. but the rational me's telling me to be sensible..to take it like a big girl n just accept that this is how its gonna be... for the rest of my life?

guess i'll be reading in my room again this weekend...