pramblings

7 months!

2012-01-24T14:01:00.001+08:00

Our precious turned 7 months a couple of days back. 7 months! All those struggles we had when he was just a wee bit old seemed ages away. But they were that - struggles. No sugar-coating your way through this - the first few weeks of your journey through parenthood will be challenging. But it gets better. Much better :D

night duty

2011-08-16T02:43:00.003+08:00

it's 3 in the morning and i'm sitting in a darkened room listening to the gentle snorings of the husband and the whimperings of the boy. yes - the boy. our precious boy, has arrived some 7 weeks back. and my life has not returned to normalcy since then.

is it normal to feel completely inadequate and helpless? that mothering instinct that's supposed to kick in once baby arrives, i think it decided to give me a miss, cos i don't think i have it. what i do have, though, is a growing list of failures.

i shall not dwell on my failings as a mother.

staying up late - now that's something i can do. so here i am, on night duty today and every day. taking care of baby, when he's semi-groggy anyway and doesnt need much coaxing to go to sleep once awake - this i can do.

well hello!

2011-05-12T13:51:00.000+08:00

i was suddenly hit by a thought while having kway teow goreng for lunch just now (yes fat-laden food has that effect on us sometimes) that i should start blogging again. of course there's the problem of remembering what the fish the name of my blog was, or even the account details to log in. but as luck would have it, i was directed straight to the dashboard - apparently i'm already logged on to google, which apparently is my account userid. so...hurrah for serendipity (not really the correct word to use in this instance, but i like the sound of it and it's MY blog, so there)!

it has been a good 1 year and 3 months since i last blogged, and reading the last post kinda put a smile on my face you know. i do so love my husband, and it is just like him to do this kind of thing. so things have been great on THAT front, if not better :)

it's not that there's nothing much to blog these days. it's that there are just too many things happening, that finding the time to sit down and type them all down would just take away the time for me to do something else. but that's like being such a super-poser dont you think, claiming that you don't have time to blog because you're way too busy? the truth of the matter is that i just got plain lazy, and having twitter does not help.

though the 'many things happening' in my life is not too much of a stretch either. some highlights:

i got seconded to a 'hostile' posting, where i spent the better part of my time evading missiles while at the same time mining info for the powers that be. oh but of course i do some decent work too

i got promoted, for agreeing to said posting, which meant a huge pay jump that inadvertently made me spend even more

i shop and shop, not so much for branded goods (i never got around to getting myself another expensive bag after my Kate Spade, which unfortunately has to suffer the indignity of forever being associated wif TPL - but such is life), but for old retro-looking items for the house. weekends are spent scouring for finds. we still have an old kitchen cupboard (the kind they used to store cooked dishes back in the old days) stowed away in a dingy shophouse store in melaka, which has yet to be transported back to SG.

we clean the house - which really is a gargantuan task, seeing to the amount of rubbish, err sorry, GEMS we've gotten from our shopping. and the cleaning never.seems.to.end! add to that the weekly laundry that has to be done, and the house is in a perpetual mess!

we renewed our lease for the house, which means another 2 years here in uv. i am personally in love with the place, though it can never compare to cg (but how to compare to cg i ask you?? location, location, location!). this also means that we're kinda sinking our roots there, which also means that there'll be more home-grown papayas to look forward to. did i tell you the papaya trees we'd carelessly planted have borne fruits?? the wonder of it all!

we travelled - nowhere far, but travelled nonetheless. had some fantabulous times travelling with the family, 1st to kl, and then to bintan where we had our very own villa with our very own pool. oh and we went on a cruise for the first time ever, that was nice. went to kk and kl and krabi for work, those were great trips. and we went melaka melaka melaka. i've lost track of the number of times we've been there, but we love the place so much, and there's always something new to discover.

my brother got married, and you know how time-consuming weddings are, even if it's not your own! oh and i had to organise a seminar cum retreat to hi chi minh for 350 pax (a logistical nightmare!) and oversee its smooth running while in singapore overseeing my brother's wedding!

my parents moved house, and then moved again. which means a whole lot of packing and unpacking and re-packing and unpacking to do.

so you see, i really was rather busy (excuses!). plus i suspect that i'm just plain lazy and no longer as disciplined as before when it comes to penning down my thoughts. i've often marvelled at the discipline and determination shown by my favourite bloggers - there is always something to read because they're constantly posting up new posts. and they're not idle people with no day jobs mind you.

but i also know that i cannot let laziness and ill-discipline get in the way of recording my thoughts for posterity. especially not now. who cares if nobody reads them - i would be reading them, and i WANT to know what i was feeling, thinking, and doing during this period of my life. it is not everyday that one gets pregnant with one's first kid yah, and although i'm like 8 months too late, it is better late than never :)

so...hello everyone! expect to hear more from me soon!

love note

2010-02-11T15:59:00.003+08:00

it's only 3 days to valentine's
and since love is in the air.......
i thought i'd share what i found in the fridge the other day when i was abt to grab a quick breakfast before heading off to work...

HELLO!

2010-02-10T17:55:00.000+08:00

my friend told me in msn today that life is boring cos i've stopped blogging.

hahha!

ok i may be stretching the truth here, but the fact remains that i've not blogged for MONTHS now. and it's already the new year.

so i'm saying HELLO to pramblings again. HELLO!

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i'm feeling very restless and bored sitting in the office after running around the island the last few days. and it doesnt help that i've just received news that 2 of my colleagues have tendered...bringing the sum total to THREE just in this month of february!

amazing!

i wonder if i can get a job easily should i look.
would anyone want me?
how marketable am i?
how much am i worth?

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among other things, i'm currently enrolled in a year-long orga.nisation de.velopm.ent course, which started last october (i think). at the risk of sounding uncool, i actually LIKE this course. i've gained many insights, and i hope i'll be blogging about them just so they're captured.

******************************************************

this is a month too late.

but HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone!

may this new year be our best one yet.

salam ramadhan | eating out

2009-08-24T12:39:00.007+08:00

one of the things i'll start doing this ramadhan is to conscientiously leave EARLY every single working day. i've not been doing that the last few ramadhans, and i always ended up being home rite in time for buka, or not even making it in time. and then there were days when breaking fast meant just some biscuits and milo in the office.

my rationale then was that theres no point in leaving early since there's gonna be nobody at home anyway. but thats plain wrong rite. just bcos there's no one at home doesnt mean you deprive yrself of some deserved rest rite. so yes. from today onwards i shall go home EARLY! yeah!

-----------------------------

we hv been eating 'out' more these days. the front lawn at uv is just more accessible than the back lawn at cg. and the weather is kinder at uv somehow (or is it just the overall effects of climate change? hmmm), which makes it perfect for a meal out in the middle of the day.

the famished diner

stir-fried vege

cereal prawn

view from the table

pics above taken the weekend before puasa. and the food's courtesy of the hubs, who's a whizz at cooking. me, i'd rather do the cleaning up if i have the choice (which is not to say that i dont cook lah, but he's the appointed chef in this household).

that was also the weekend when we finally, FINALLY cooked on a REAL gas stove using real LPG gas. our gas stove from cg could not be used because it used piped gas whereas the place in uv uses cylinder gas, which means that we'd have to get a brand new gas stove for this and since we had to host some guests the first week we moved in, we bought a portable stove using those portable gas canisters, not knowing that we'd be using that for d next 2 over months. anyway, we finally thot enuff is enuff and called the gas man and connected the gas cylinder to a stove bought in melaka (just 1 stove only but at least it uses REAL gas and i think it should be sufficient for us since we only use 1 hob out of 4 hobs that were available in the last one).

i should not be going on and on and on about cooking in the middle of a fasting day :D

till next time....selamat berpuasa y'all!

on being a weekday single

2009-07-30T01:50:00.000+08:00

the thing about being a single on weekdays is that you dont feel guilty about coming home late from work. which also means you tend to stay back in the office WAY too often than you'd have liked. which also means that you end up eating breakfast food at nite most times....like cereal wif milk, or peanut butter jelly sandwich.

which is really not a bad thing actually. i LOVE peanut butter jelly sandwich.

but i digress. being a single on weekdays also means that i get to have a lot of me time. time to spend with friends. time to hit the gym. time to just shop for hours without actually buying anything. time to read my books. time to watch mindless hours of tv both online and off. and time to surf, and blog, and basically get yrself connected to the world at large thru mindless tweets and fb.

the thing about being a single on weekdays is that you sometimes work too much. so much that your back aches and you'd do anything for a loving touch to knead the pain away.

and that you sometimes have so much to say but no one to say it to, so much that you feel like you will explode to pieces with all the unspoken mundane nonsense of how your day had gone for you, or how you think this particular news on tv was hilarious, or how so and so from the office was driving you nuts with all the politics.

sigh

the thing about being a single on weekdays is that you appreciate your partner more when they're around. you dont take your relationship for granted, and every single minute spent together becomes soo precious it is savoured till its last drop and still you're not satiated. which also means that you come to the realisation that you're totally and wholeheartedly in love with him, and you wonder sometimes how you've been so blessed.

i am blessed, and for that i am thankful. alhamdulillah.

but i am also, at this very moment, missing him a lot.

bus adventure

2009-07-28T23:27:00.004+08:00

my brother got the car for the day today (special day mah...ehem), so my parents were left car-less. nevermind, car-less doesnt mean helpless rite. so mum managed to convince dad to go check out the new geylang market by public transport.

they took the train to bedok, then bus to geylang. very simple.

my dad the bus novice though, had no idea how to use the humble ezlink card. so he went up the bus, and tapped the card onto the card reader. with both hands holding the card. and he tapped and he tapped. but the thing kept blinking red and churning out angry beeping sounds.

turned out he's been tapping the card onto the display panel on top instead of the part below! hahha damm funny i tell you. especially when you hear the story from them at the dinner table!

i LOVE my parents. they can be super know-it-all, naggy, protective and all (as any parents would i suppose), but they're MY parents and i LOVE them.

if nobody speaks of remarkable things

2009-07-27T23:26:00.004+08:00

"He says my daughter,
and all the love he has is wrapped up in the tone of his voice when he says those two words,
he says my daughter you must always look with both of your eyes and listen with both of your ears.

He says this is a very big world and there are many many things you could miss if you are not careful.

He says there are remarkable things all the time, right in front of us, but our eyes have like the clouds over the sun and our lives are paler and poorer if we do not see them for what they are.

He says, if nobody speaks of remarkable things, how can they be called remarkable?"

i am so struck by the book, i am in awe.

mrt companions

2009-07-06T23:01:00.007+08:00

these 2 books were my mrt companions 2 weeks into uv. discovered there's a library near d station (yeyy!), and though the collection wasnt fantastic, it would suffice for the rides (and STRICTLY for the rides, i must add. which is actually not an easy thing to keep to cos i keep wanting to continue my reading at home but that just wont do cos there are a gazillion things one can do at home, chief of which is to watch tv, and feed the fish, and surf the net, all 3 a must for every weekday night but not necessarily in that order)

i must say i was impressed with the first, being leslie silbert's debut novel and all. it's part spy thriller, part historical novel, involving the last days of the real-life playwright/poet christopher marlowe (who some said was as brilliant, if not more, as shakespeare and would hv been insanely popular if not for his early demise). i'm looking forward to her second novel, which apparently is still in the making.

the second one's typical anita shreve. she has a way of writing that's somewhat lyrical and poignant. anyway, i realised that i hv many of her books (courtesy of the $5 mph warehouse sales over d years) which are as yet unread, and the only reason why i'm borrowing this is cos i've yet to unpack my books. procrastination is the mother of all diseases i tell you.

on moving and turning 32

2009-07-05T18:29:00.001+08:00

so it's been a while. i moved house, turned 32 (yeyy!), and started re-acquainting myself with frens. is it possible for us to grow younger as the days go by? i feel young these days. must be the running, or the uv air, or both.

the one thing i dont particularly fancy abt the new place is waking up early to go to work. i HAVE to leave the house at ard 8 if i were to have any chance of coming to work on time. and the journey takes abt an hour in total, which is a bloody long time if you ask me.

what is good tho is that i've been saving on cab fare. it used to be that i'd be taking the cab to work nearly every day when i was in cg, since it's pretty near the office. but there's no way i'd be taking a cab to work from uv - it's just too far away! the further you are from the office the more likely it is that you'd come on time and save on cab fare. strange but true.

so i'm 32 and a month today (or yesterday to be precise), and i'm loving every minute of it. i'm more confident and sure of myself, compared to my 20s when i was still trying to figure out who i was and how i figured in the scheme of things. the 20s was all about pleasing others dont you think? we were young and clueless and so we do things that we 'think' could validate our existence in this world. now in our 30s, i'd like to think that we've gone past that. that we're mature and confident enough to look at the big picture, to grab the many opportunities life has to offer.

may my 32nd year be my best yet, InsyaAllah :)

running

2009-05-19T19:18:00.000+08:00

am having a breather in uv after running around like like a lady possessed the whole day. it's no fun having to supervise the contractors at the new home, AND have movers come to the old to give quotations for their moving service (how much is too much?)

on another note, this is actually the first time i'm in uv alone without him. at night. i can get used to this.

walking in the rain

2009-05-11T14:51:00.001+08:00

nothing like a walk in the rain to chase away those monday blues :)

i think i'm suffering from work burnout. motivation level is close to zero....and am dragging my feet to work most days. like today.

i need a break. and i think a huge helping of baba chendol would help :D

fun headache

2009-04-23T18:24:00.002+08:00

moving house is pretty fun, and pretty much a headache too. we've already started moving some of our stuffs to uv, but there are still tons more in cg yet to be packed.

and we're cheapo, which means that we'll be bringing over practically all our aircon units, our water heaters, our furniture, even our curtain rods! which also means that we'd have to uninstall many of the stuffs, and install them back again in uv...pretty labour-intensive if you ask me.

we'll also be bringing over the plants - a key reason why we're moving to uv is so that we'd have space for the plants. but bringing the plants would mean that we'd have to UPROOT them first...arrrggghh...and replant them again! which would also mean that i'll have my heart all torn up again cos i KNOW when you transplant them the plants will die (cos of shock perhaps?) before they produce new shoots. arrrggh!

some of the plants in cg which will be uprooted and transplated in uv. check out more of our cg pics here!

too young

2009-03-11T19:10:00.005+08:00

the letters were out yesterday.

my head said i'd definitely not get it this year cos i just got a whopping pay adjustment late last year. but my heart obviously thought otherwise, secretly hoping that i'd be recognised for my outstanding contributions (ahem) for last year.

my head won...of cos. no promotion for me :(

i cant say i'm not disappointed. i really thought i did well last year, and if THAT could not account for a promotion then i dont know what would.

and what sucks the most is being told that the bosses thought i'm TOO YOUNG to be promoted to the next grade. TOO YOUNG!

on the brighter side....the amount of money i'm getting for PB is pretty decent...hehhe...so i'm not all sad :)

the number 3 | introducing UV

2009-03-03T23:03:00.006+08:00

the number 3 holds special significance to me.

i got my driving licence on 3.3.03.

on that very day, we were 'officially' an item too....which makes us 6 today! hehhe

our current address has 33 in it, and...

our bid ending with the numbers 33 was the winning bid...yeyy!

we decided on a whim to place a bid for a place in the east (back to the east for me!), and what do you know, we got it! alhamdulillah. it wasnt something that was planned. we didnt even know the place was available until the morning of the viewing, and that too because he happened to ask me (while on his way to pick me up from work on saturday - yes, had to bloody work on a saturday...urrgh) to check on the website to see what was available.

so anyway...we went for the viewing, and thought the place nicely done up. we've been around the area before, but didnt really think much of it cos the whole area looked rather run down then if you ask me. but like i said, they seemed to have done up the place rather nicely. so we thought we'd try with a bid.

the market has really gone soft now hasnt it. i dont think our bid would have been successful a year ago, or in fact, 2 months ago. as it is, we've been told that we're the cheapest among our neighbours so far. alhamdulillah...we've been truly blessed.

introducing uv

new plans

2009-02-24T18:33:00.001+08:00

the cg chapter is finally ending. we knew the lease will be up soon, but we've sort of harboured some hope that we could somehow convince the powers that be to extend our lease till the end of the year.

but that's like waiting for fate to deal us a hand. and you know we'd rather make our own fate :)

we're making alternate arrangements now...wish us all the best yah..

in the meantime, here are some pics from our last get-together @ cg....

food & frens

we brought the sofa out..hahha!

is that a kingfisher spotted in our backyard???

bookworm

2009-02-17T23:56:00.003+08:00

i've found back my love of reading. it's not that i'd stopped completely. just that i don't think i'd obsessively read a book from start to finish in under 2 days flat for the last 2 years, until recently.

it all started early this year when we were hosting a 'party' (as ana my tenant would call it, though it's more like a chill-out get-together over bbq kinda thing) for friends early this year. a group of us were at the table, and the girls were talking about the latest movie to hit the screens then- twilight. and i was telling them about how i was intrigued to get the book cos everyone was saying it was way better than the movie, but that i couldnt seem to get my hands on one cos they were all sold out (which was true back then!). and lo and behold ana herself had all 4 books, which she promptly lent to me.

of course i didnt start on them till the hubs was away (weekends are too precious to be spent reading trashy juvenile novels dont you think ? :P), but the moment he was gone i started on the first, and i was hooked. not because it was well-written (it's very juvenile and nauseatingly sweet-valley-high), but because edward cullen was CUTE, and so heartbreakingly endearing. it helped that i could picture exactly how he'd look like (i caught the film online immediately after i put down the first book..hehh. so-so movie, to-die-for lead actor :P). and immediately after that, i started on the second, then the third, then the fourth.

i finished the 4 books in 4 nights straight (or rather...nights & early mornings. i didn't read during working hours - very unprofessional, and EMBARASSING, to be caught dead with those books).

the books made me hungry for more. and being the cheapo that i am, i copiously took down the titles of books that caught my eye when we were at borders (our weekly ritual...borders-browsing), and stopped by the library one day after a meeting to see if i could get them there. and i could! nlb is so hip i tell you...hahahahhha (even though they refuse to write off even fines dating back to 2000 amounting to a grand total of like $0.80...bleah)!

so i've been reading. and reading. and reading. i've gotten it back! the mojo!

i slept at 330 this morning devouring night watch (the book rocks! must get the other two!). i'm officially knackered.

but i'm happy :)

once a bookworm, always a bookworm. yeah!

the curious case of bb

2009-02-09T21:05:00.000+08:00

1. i'm curious as to why the movie is so long. it lasted for about 2 and a half hours. i'm very sure it can be shortened.

2. i'm curious as to why bradd.pitt acted so 'stoned' throughout the movie. he was stoned when he's 5, and he was stoned when he's 40. shouldnt he be exhibiting a little bit of excitement sometimes? like when he rode that to-die-for looks-like-triumph-bonneville bike through the roads? surely having the wind in your face would elicit some sort of smile? there was none. and for that, i dont think he deserves to be nominated for best actor.

3. (and the most curious award goes to....) i'm curious as to how bb is born as a baby, but died as a baby too. i mean, i get that he's supposed to age in reverse. but if he's born in the body of a baby with the physical/mental conditions of an 80-year-old, he should die in the body of an 80-year old with the physical/mental conditions of a baby. ie he should still be brad pitt, but a brad pitt who can only suck his thumb and go gugu-gaga instead of talking.

so i dont think the movie is as great as all the nominations purported it to be. but it does have its moments.....like that haunting quote "your life is defined by its opportunities...even the ones you miss" which is still in my head even now.

the best thing about the movie though, was the opportunity it gave me and him to date each other. i totally enjoyed our walk through orchard road in the wee hours of the morning, the jokes we shared, the easy way he hugged me.

last weekend was magical, but not curious at all :)

25 things

2009-02-02T23:18:00.001+08:00

pakcikely tagged me on facebook...so i'll humour him. but i'm not gonna do this there cos some things are better left within a closer circle of friends :)

so here goes..

RULES: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I am short, specky, and how one would describe, not unattractive (ahem :P)

2. I am inherently intelligent (seriously), but hopelessly lazy. Which explains why I can be in the top class of the top sec school (cos you dont exactly have to study hard for psle do you?), and yet end up with only a merit degree in a generic non-professional discipline.

3. (But) I'm happy. My lifelong ambition is to be happy. Asked what I would like to be when I'm in school, I'd invariably answer "I want to be happy". And I'm happy. Alhamdulillah.

4. I'm hopelessly in love with my husband.

5. I am a toughie. And a tough negotiator to boot. Cross me and you'll be sorry.

6. I've been cautioned several times earlier in my career to be more diplomatic with my words. I can't help it, I'm sarcastic like that. I've mellowed some, but I can still sting.

7. (But) I am a mush when it comes to affairs of the heart

8. I am afraid of dogs, cats, rats, among other creatures. But rats are currently residing at the top of the list. Because they have decided to reside IN MY KITCHEN. Arrrgghhhhhhh!

9. I'm a ManU fan. Glory glory man uniiiiiiiited!

10. I'm a voracious reader. Or at least I was, lost it, and now back on the road again.

11.I finished reading the 4 twilight books in 4 nights. I know - they're juvenile. But I can't help it. Yes the books are sooo sweetvalleyhigh, but the premise is interesting. And edward the character is soo irresistable, AND edward played by robert pattinson is TO DIE FOR.

12. I discovered last week that i'm one of thousands who owed our govt $$ for not paying my library fines. That's cos I borrow most of my books. I only buy books if they're on sale - like really super duper cheap sale kind. (I've settled my fines btw....if not how to borrow more?)

13. I'm a cheapo. I think twice, and then 5times more, before i spend my bucks on something that costs $20. Which is why I've yet to spend on an It bag, even though I've been coveting some. And which is why my wadrobe is full of charlesandkeith, g2 (when they're on sale), giordano and coax items.

14. I HEART purple. My spectacle rims are purple. I have 2 purple watches. I have a different purple outfit for every day of the workweek for a month (I think). I've used my purple suede bag for so many years it's now ratty and yet I'm still using it occassionally. I have a pair of purple stilettos that I wear to work sometimes which look kinda tacky but which my colleagues think are superb. I drink from a purple waterbottle. I have a blog called purple ramblings and i call myself pu.rperg.er. Enough said.

15. I used to be 42kg. Now I'm 52. I console myself by donating blood - might as well do something good since I'm fat. My last donation: 17Jan09.

16. I want to lose weight - the healthy way. That means more exercise, and watching my food. Exercise is hard because I'm lazy (see point 2), and watching my food is hard because I love food. I'm in big trouble.

17. I want to climb MountK, scuba dive, and get a motorcycle licence before the year is up. The first two are do-able, but the third is kinda iffy. Cos taking a licence takes a certain kind of commitment, and I'm lazy for that (see point 2).

18. I love riding on the bike (pillion of course). There's something about having the wind in your face, and being exposed to the elements. And I love being on a long roadtrip on a bike. It binds you somehow...to the person you're on the roadtrip with.

19. My ideal guy must be at least 1.7m, wear specs, and read newspapers. My husband fits all 3, and more :)

20. I've never cooked (and I never know how to cook) kari, assam pedas, lauk lemak and the like. But my potato salad's the best (so they say), and I've yet to try an aglio olio better than mine (ok...except perhaps my husband's).

21. I hope to have kids some day, InsyaAllah.

22. I was at the Holy Land at the same time as my husband, except that we didnt know it then. We only got to know each other 6 years later. Life's beautiful like that.

23. I used to sing alto for the jc choir. And I was in the jc guitar ensemble too (coached by the inspiring peter abi.sheg. anath.an no less). Come to think of it, I played the recorder in my primary school ensemble, and the angklung in the angklung orchestra. I'm musically inclined!!! Muakakakaka

24. I live in a rental and am renting out the one I bought. We're looking for another rental once the lease is up, not because we're snobs, but because my husband's a kampung boy (who's lived in a kampung till he's 17) at heart who likes the greenery and walking around barefoot. Which means that rats will probably be a mainstay in my life...urrgh.

25. I have many many friends but very few close ones. It gets harder making new close friends the older you are, don't you think? But the few that you have are priceless, and life will surely be emptier without them :)

what a match!

2009-01-31T16:04:00.002+08:00

the nadal-verdasco match was such a thriller i'm still reeling from the high of it all. whoever's heard of verdasco? not me anyway, but i became a fan in an instant..hahha!

i've always been amazed at how tennis players seem to be like duracell bunnies...they just go on and on. when the match started (5pm sg time), i was just back at the office from a meeting outside, and was pestering my colleagues to have a drink with me down at the basement's only 'cheap' kopi haunt. we had our drink....then i went back up to hammer a ppt presentation for d meeting on monday...and realised belatedly that i had missed my self-imposed deadline of leaving the office by 6. i then rushed back home to 'welcome' the exterminators (a story for another day)...but they were earlier than they said they would be so i missed them but thank god for housemates who took care of the whole thing. then turned on the tv...match was well under way so i took it in while having my yogurt dinner. clock turned 8 so it was time for american idol...but i was intrigued so i kept switching channels..which proved futile after a while cos d match was obviously winning my attention. so there i was, mesmerised by the sight of 2 men who's still serving winners and delivering great forehands even 4 hours into the match. and the match (i suspect) would have gone on and on and on based on sheer brute strength and resolve alone, if it was not finally undone by double faults, after a phenomenal 5hr 14mins.

phew...it was tiring watching the 2 go at it!

i must admit i was a wee bit heartbroken at having my newly-minted idol verdasco falter at the very end. he was such a strong man! strong in that he refused to give up, or give in to the greatness that was nadal. "every time it seemed verdasco looked spent against nadal, he found another wind, another big serve, another forehand".

AND he's cute to boot...hahha. i just learned that he once posed nude for Cosmopolitan :P

it was a match that left me so psyched up i couldnt sleep till 7 in the morning!

now for the final!

new year, new look

2009-01-29T19:00:00.002+08:00

so this is it. my first post for the new year, AND the NIU year..hahha!

things are busybusybusy on the job front, and we figure that it's gonna get busier before we're done. what with the gloomy outlook out there...gdp forecast of between -5% to -2% (hey the numbers are being repeated to me so often i can practically repeat them in my sleep liao)...it's no wonder we're busy. but we're busy for a reason...a very noble one at that (one that brought me here in the first place)...so i'm not complaining.

anyway, we all need something cheerful our way dont we. so...bright and pink it is. nothing purple here..but no worries...i'm still a purple fan at heart :)

2 years!

2008-12-16T23:14:00.000+08:00

time flies when you're having fun

to my dearest husband...you're the most humble yet cocky, grounded yet ambitious, serious yet funny, seemingly dumb yet intelligent man i've known.

you also have the uncanny ability to melt my heart...only to melt it again

and for that i love you :)

here's to manymany more years together...and may all our dreams come true..insyaAllah

obamamania

2008-11-05T21:56:00.001+08:00

today was a truly historic day.

i can write a thesis on why his win was so important and inspiring to me and to many of my frens.....thousands of miles away though we may be.

but i'll just sum it all up in 3 words......... "yes we can"

poor massa

2008-11-03T03:17:00.000+08:00

i cant believe timo glock slowed down at the last....wtf was he doing??? to gift hamilton the championship just like that???

i'm super pissed!

i've always thought hamilton DOES NOT DESERVE the championship, even before this last race...and winning it this way just proves my point.

bleah

tokyo | work pays

2008-10-29T22:55:00.000+08:00

we didnt really have time to entertain during raya this year...what with him not in sg most days and me bogged down with work..

had a week in tokyo 2 weeks ago (weather was good, food was great...but work was something else), and i've been occupied with post-tokyo work since then i'm amazed i've not drowned yet.

but yes. life has been good (though hectic), and i'm happy. oh and did i tell you i got a whopping (to my standards at least) market pay adjustment that was like so totally unexpected it left me speechless and close to tears? ok..not TOTALLY unexpected...i did hear through the grapevine that it was in the offing....but i didnt expect THAT much NOW. we're indeed blessed... Alhamdulillah..

tonite will be the first nite in days that i'll be sleeping before 3 (work is a killer...but it pays!!)

good nite everyone

selamat hari raya!

2008-10-07T23:34:00.001+08:00

selamat hari raya aidilfitri....maaf zahir dan batin :)

last week was great. he was on his break the whole week, and i naturally took leave too. it's not often that we get to spend so much time continuously together yah.

he's been away 2 days now and i'm already missing him :) but i have a gazillion things to do at work, so it's not too bad.

here's wishing one and all a joyous blessed time with your loved ones!

f1 from the office!

2008-09-26T15:20:00.000+08:00

at this very moment, i can hear the roar of the cars from my office as they speed through the circuit.

how exciting!

we mistakenly thought the f1 cars were having their practice runs, but soon realised that these were bmw cars instead..hehh. had a quick glimpse at the programme and yes... the Formula BMW Series are having their practice runs just about now.

just imagine...these are not even the real mccoys and they're already so loud! be prepared for more earth-shattering noise once the f1 cars had their turn on the circuit!

anyways..earlier today..some of us got excited over these..

unfortunately...they belong to the boss. ah well...we can always watch from the office. which is exactly what most of us are planning to do. the first f1 practice session starts today at 7pm, so most of us will be staying back just so we can have a look. too bad i've a meeting later in the west...or i'd definitely have stayed back too! butBUTBUT...there's always tomorrow! and sunday!!

hehhe. so EXCITING!

blessed

2008-09-10T00:02:00.000+08:00

a whole month has come and gone and i've totally missed out on blogging a post. damm. but i've never been busier in all my life, and i'm totally loving it. yes i whine abt my pay (do you know how much a fresh grad is paid nowadays??? and they're nowhere near to adjusting my pay..hmmph!) and i whine abt my pay (it's really measly..trust me)...but i'm ok with my work.

at.the.moment.

which is not to say that i wont be looking around for something better. though i'm not cos i'm really busy. but yes, if something better comes along, i might just go for it. then again, how can something better come along if i dont go look for it? hmmm

by the way, selamat berpuasa y'all!

i'd never expected while breaking my fast without my family last year that i'd be breaking my fast without him this year. feels funny. but the times apart make you closer, and just like i am totally enjoying the times i break fast with my family now, i am also so savouring the precious days when i can break fast with him.

i am alone,but not lonely. i am blessed.

grey's | samui trip

2008-07-29T03:51:00.000+08:00

i just finished watching grey's anatomy season 4 and am all teary and sniffy. i cant wait for season 5. pls oh pls oh pls dont separate them again. i'm just too tired for all the drama...and i want to see them happy together. and i felt like hugging alex and telling him it'll be ok. i SO wanna know what's the story wif him there.

so...what shall i watch next? hmmmmm

anyways....pics of my samui trip is finally up....like finally finally....hahha.

and i'm finally uploading those video shots we took along the way. still not fully done yet...but here's a teaser...

baggy dreams

2008-07-23T00:21:00.000+08:00

i'm currently nursing a bimbotic phase that's been keeping me up for days...

bags!

today's payday and the mid-year bonus will be paid out...and i so want to indulge myself by splurging on something trivial...bags!

i've never in my life spent anything above $100 for bags....my current 2 bags which i've used ad nauseum cost me less than $50 each...and i'm not what one would generally call a big-spender (spider's VERY lucky to hv me as a wife...hahha). but i've been overcome by this huge desire to splurge on an IT bag, and i'm determined to get it!

hey, it's either that or the samsung omnia...something else that i'm coveting...and if i can even consider splurging on that...i can definitely splurge on a bag

but which bag to buy?? and how much is too much???

riled up | crossroads

2008-07-17T21:01:00.000+08:00

6 years ago, my RO told me that i need to be more diplomatic, more cool, in my dealings with 'the other side'. and i agreed with him totally. i got riled up quite easily, and when i'm angry/irritated/frustrated, it showed.

fast forward to today...i realised i've still not gained mastery over my emotions. i'd inadvertently raised my voice to my colleague, and now i feel shitty. i'd apologised to her, but still i feel bad.

the problem with me is that i have no patience for rigidity, and stupidity. in my line of work, things are seldom black or white. often, you'll find yourself in situations that are grey. so you must know how to manage this without putting yourself in a quandary. and if you insist on having a clearcut black or white answer to the situation you're in, then you're just being rigid. this was exactly the reasoning i was trying to put forth to her, when she was demanding a black or white answer. but i guess my emotions got the better of me, and i flared.

my other colleague totally see my point. but i must learn to be tolerant, she said. and yups, i totally agree with her on that!

someone else was telling me that the higher you get in the organisation, the more you must learn to let go. i was sharing with him about how i missed the good old days, when i was really in the thick of things, negotiating for real tangible things that would really have an effect to the people i serve. and how, given the chance, i would want to go back to doing just that. but he pointed out that there will always be the new ones who can fill that role, and that where i am now is just as important, if not more important, cos i'm the one setting out the directions and providing the tools for them to do the work. so if i want to move higher in the organisation, i must be prepared to do more macro work and leave the rough and tumble ground work to others.

which leads me to think- do i really want to leave all these ground work behind? granted i am ambitious, so moving up the ladder is obviously in my plans. but do i do that at the expense of my passion? and can i really do that, seeing as to how easily i flew off the handle with my colleague over something i should not have gotten all worked up about?

you come to a point in your career when you think - should i leave now? i came to that point last year. i so desperately wanted to leave my job, because it grew to be boring and meaningless. but then i was given the lifeline when i was posted out to another dept, and i got motivated again. the last few weeks have been challenging though. so many of my peers are leaving. which leads me to thinking - what on earth am i still doing here? but yah, there are a lot of opportunities for me here to grow, and of cos being the only one bringing home the bacon (so to speak) right now makes it just a little tad harder for me to leave. so i think i'm staying put...for now.

hmmm this has veered way off. i still feel bad abt just now. she's a really nice girl, just that she's too straight sometimes, if you know what i mean. i must be nice, and tolerant. i must stop being so mean :P

hot date

2008-07-11T18:02:00.001+08:00

was in hanoi the last couple of days to conduct a workshop for one of our affiliates. it was one full day of work and 4 days of r&r, so i'm not complaining...heee. this affiliate is quite high-class one, so i travelled in sq and stayed in good hotels....so lagi not complaining.

but the trip took me away from him...and its been ages since i last saw him. my colleagues understood why it is then that i've been jumping up and down the whole day today...i SO cant wait to see him later!! yeyy!

it's been raining a lot these days...which is good cos that means my plants are all well taken care of. which reminds me...i owe is my plant stories...which i've not been able to do. sigh. but her plants are all so nice and colourful...and now i'm jealous..especially when she mentioned her mint leaves...which i've none. should i rekindle my died-ed already passion for plants and try my hands at growing more edible plants or should i just let it go and blame it all on my takde masa excuse?

but how can i say that i dont hv time when i dont even hv kids?? and it's not like as if i have a super important job that requires me to be on my toes at all times (i'd LIKE to think i'm important but thats just me in bozyland.... muakakakaka). but i still dont understand why i dont have time. it's funny.

anyway....this is just me sending off a post on the quick before i log off for the day. i wanna date my husband dis weekend. i wanna wanna wanna! cant wait!

multiplying

2008-06-27T18:57:00.000+08:00

hallo! somehow my home laptop has not been displaying the word verification thingy that you need to publish yr post in blogger...so i've not been posting of late. but dono why today there's no problem....so here i am!

here's what i've been up to so far....taken from my facebook's mini-feed(i'm lazy lah..hehhe. oh n i've replaced my name wif 'ppg'...short for purperger...kuakua)

Yesterday
ppg is pissed off wif starhub for the breakdown in transmission in the last 30mins...only to have it resumed wif happy german faces AFTER the match. FUG!5:13am

June 25
ppg is furiously uploading her outdated pics in multiply.12:30am

June 24
ppg has a rat problem at home and is feeling all terrified and helpless. Aaaaarrrgh!12:41am

June 22
ppg is bummed. holland is out. predictions all thrown out d window. does that mean italy will win next?5:26am

June 21
ppg couldnt believe what happened during the croatia-turkey match dis morning. lets hope holland will stay true to predictions!9:43am

June 20
ppg just spent her day screaming herself silly...but its ok since she's now $30 richer! muakaka.9:41pm

June 16
ppg is knocking herself silly for missing the phenomenal czech-turkey match...no more missing matches from now on!9:13pm

June 7
ppg has grudgingly parted wif some moolah juz so she can watch euro08 on cable....starhub sucks!2:22pm

As you can see, euro08 has taken up a considerable portion of my time. i live n breathe soccer....and i'm happier for it. hehhe. so it's gonna be a spain-germany final. my fave holland is out...which is really a bummer cos they were so exciting to watch during the group rounds. ah well. i'm not exactly a spain fan...but it'd be nice to see spain winning sthg after years and years of nothing. but i kinda have a soft spot for germany too...having been impressed with their 'not-boring' performance at the last world cup, and their continued 'not-boring' performance this time round. my only peeve is ballack...who i'm not exactly a fan of. so i'll support the team that plays better on the day itself...n hopefully that team wins (cos not every team that plays better wins the match...as we all know)..

moving on, have made it a mission of sorts to finish uploading whatever pictures that i have into multiply. i've done some, but many more are not in yet. most notably the road trip to samui. ok ok will do that real soon.

spider is back early today. which makes me happy....heeeee

my 31st befday

2008-06-06T18:24:00.001+08:00

on wednesday, for the first time in a long time, i woke up with no chorus of happy birthdays ringing in my ears. granted, i'm living away from my parents and brothers now, but i was already living apart from them last year. what was different this year was that he was also away from me, miles apart.

it was weird.

for the first time in a long time too, i took leave for my birthday (or did i also do that last year? hmmm). what better way to start your very own new year than to sleep in late!

and what better suprise than to have a bouquet of purple delights sent up my doorsteps! granted i DID look extremely 'glamorous' when receiving the bouquet with my right-outta-bed look, but it fitted in nicely with the bawling-my-eyes-out look that followed after i closed the door on the sweet uncle who brought me the purple delights, when it hit me that he'd ACTUALLY taken the trouble to do this. for me. and for that i love him.

see. its not difficult to make a girl happy :)

so that was how the 1st day of my 31st year of existence was for me. oh and i also treated myself to a massage, went on a shopping spree (2 pairs of shoes!), had dinner. i feel great. and more importantly, i feel young!

cant WAIT to show him my 'appreciation' later :P

and we are the CHAMPIONS OF EUROPE

2008-05-22T06:18:00.000+08:00

all hail the red devils....double winners & champions of europe...woohoooo!

the hero of the moment saves the day...as we knew he would! me n as were shouting n screaming n cursing on the phone as the penalty shootout progresses....we KNEW ronaldo's gonna miss it, we prayed (and it got answered!) that terry's gonna miss it.....n we were noisily egging van der sar on to save the kick from anelka...and saved he did! yeah!

to sum it up...tevez was useless save for his penalty, drogba was idiotic...hargreaves was hardworking...carrick was phenomenal (i'm so proud of him!)...giggs was inspirational..rooney was great i thought (so was a bit suprised when he was substituted)...scholes was fantastic (playing well even after he was injured)...evra was more than commendable (am also very proud of him)...ferdinand, vidic n wes brown were so-so in defence...ronaldo scored the opening but fell down too many times for my liking....nani and anderson were way cool for converting their penalties (even though they entered the game late into extra time and nani was bleeding from the head)....and van der sar rose up to the occassion after a mostly-lacklustre performance...to save the day!

yeeeaaahhhh!

my eyes are sore from crying.

but i'm happy :)

bummed | scarily exciting

2008-05-21T22:21:00.000+08:00

i'm really bummed cos my fave david cook got horrible reviews from the judges. they're SO into wanting david archie to be the winner...hmmph. granted he has a good voice, but i've always likened him to gary barlow from day one and you just know how gary barlow's like....nice but BORING.

so

i'm hoping for the best...i am. and whatever happens, i'll still be rooting for cook.

ok will sleep now so i can wake up later for the match. i'm so excited yet so scared i dont know what to make of it all. the prospect of the match is just so...scarily exciting?

5 hours more....

a break from madness

2008-05-20T22:54:00.001+08:00

i badly needed a break after all the madness at work....so we drove off to mersing over the long weekend

if you ask me, the beach there is better than the ones in bintan (n comparable to bali n the thai islands). yet it has managed to escape the notice of the 'sharks', who'd no sooner transform an idyllic beach location into one pandering to the populous touristy crowd.

which is all the better for me!

plus seeing fully-clad locals swimming in the sea is a definite welcome sight than near-naked angmohs i've been accustomed to :P

to sum up the weekend: nice break..wish it was longer...but i'm not complaining.

now on to serious things....like manu winning the champions league...yeah!

glory glory man united!

2008-05-12T19:35:00.000+08:00

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS once again....yeah!

watching the trophy presentation this morning gave me such a high i actually cried :P

what a fitting end to a most challenging week (work-wise for me), and what a great way to start the new week!

sigh....i'm a happy trooper :)

one down...one more to go...

i'm a happy trooper :)

trees old and new

2008-04-26T16:37:00.000+08:00

i'm still radiating copious amounts of heat after being out in the sun the whole morning. tomorrow'll be the actual do, and i'm not looking forward to being in the hot sun again. but i have to admit that it's all rather exciting...hehhe

on a totally different note, we bought over some plants from our neighbour a few doors down(she's moving away to bali!) and have transplanted them in the back yard. they're looking pretty pathetic, to be honest, all dried up and wilting, but we have every faith that they're gonna recover from the shock of it all and prosper...i hope!

our next-door neighbour had also moved out (they're all slowly but surely moving out to make room for the foreign students from a certain school of public policy who in all observations do not know the meaning of basic civic-mindedness...but thats fodder for another story), and lo and behold the powers that be went right ahead and cleared all the trees in her backyard! one moment there was lush greenery, and the next they're gone!

i dont get why they're doing this. do the trees pose any danger to our safety? no. are they such an eyesore? definitely not. in fact at the rate they're chopping down the trees every time a tenant moves out, college green will be devoid of the greenery it's been known for. a mockery of the name dont you think? it will truly be an eyesore then.

so yes, even though our days here are numbered, we'll do all we can to 'greenify' the place. plant some plants here, salvage some plants there. lets just hope they dont all die in our hands :P

relish

2008-03-31T12:31:00.001+08:00

we finally checked out the eatery across the road from our place yesterday. truth be told...we've not actually tried any of the eateries there...save for mad jacks & mcdonalds..hehhe...so better try them out fast before we move out of the place for good...

seared tuna salad

grilled portobello tofu burger

the price was a bit steep to my liking...but the food was nice. i especially liked the tuna salad..nice presentation n good taste. the tofu burger was very filling....n i realised that i dont fancy tofu all that much....but the portobello was delicious...n the onions were caramelised to perfection...i like!

this outlet is actually the sister outlet to the more famous eatery at mt emily. you might want to give it a try if you're in the area. i'm more the pasta person...so i'll try the original outlet next to see if their pastas are anything to die for.

of shoes, and the eyebags monster

2008-03-27T01:17:00.000+08:00

i know that i've not been in here for some time, but i didnt know it's been this long.

we got back from our road trip to koh samui safe and sound by the way, in case you're wondering. we cant believe we made it there and back on the bonnie cos the bonnie's more the relek cruising about town kinda bike rather than the roadtrip kinda bike. but we made it...so yeyy!

took a few video shots throughout the trip....been wanting to put them together but as you can see, i'm obviously not very on the ball on this...hahha. my dream of making an award-winning travel documentary will just have to wait i suppose :P

i've been knee-deep in work the last few weeks. very busy, but i like. my shoes are killing me with all the running around that i've been doing though. if only actual running is involved, where it's actually exercise you're doing. which i've not been doing. the exercise i mean. and thats kinda ironic cos i'm the one who brought in the fitness trainers who are stationed at the company gym to provide assistance and customised exercise programs for those who want them, and yet i've not made use of this myself.

i must get new shoes. good ones. not the cheap ones from charles and keith which have been my brand of choice the last few years cos they're cheap yet nice. they dont last long and they're really not very ergonomically friendly for the feet to be honest. so i shall pamper myself for once and get a pair of working shoes that maybe cost more than $100? hahha. the theory is that expensive shoes are comfortable - we shall just see about that shall we. and yes i've never in my life spent above $100 for working shoes...track shoes, running shoes yes....but never work/dress shoes. dont roll your eyes ah...i'm cheapo like that.

the downside to working so hard is that i do a lot more work at home now. i'm out and about so much during the day that i'm left with really not much of a choice but to bring work home. which is bad cos when i'm on d lappie at home i will always most definitely be distracted by the many online offerings...which in turn has transformed me into the eyebags monster especially since spider's not around most nights nowadays which explains why i can spend so much time online without having to deal with stuffs like sleeping.

but i'm rambling. and i must clean up so that i can catch up on my sleep.

will blog abt the samui roadtrip soon. gd nite!

off to conquer the roads

2008-02-06T13:12:00.000+08:00

pictures of my phuket trip is finally up! check out here for the pics!

in other news...we're off to conquer the roads this evening. wish us a safe journey yah!

mad bangkok weekend

2008-01-31T19:49:00.000+08:00

heyhey

we made a super short trip over the weekend to bangkok to join my parents and bros who were there earlier. shopping was ok and food was ok, but the best thing was the company. it's been ages since i've done this with my family, so am really glad that we did it.

it was funny cos there were ppl on the plane and in bangkok who recognised us from our stint on tv (gasp!). must be his botahead lah...hahha. and some even thought we went there cos we just won the money. which is like hilarious cos we've not gotten the money yet and the recording was done ages ago and the timing of the trip was purely coincidental. so anyways...THAT (our tv stint) was something huh...hahha...we sure had fun!

i've still got loads to talk abt on phuket, i've not uploaded the pics for bangkok yet, and we might just be riding to samui over the cny hols. happiness. seems like we're in a rush to do things yah...but we ARE starting a new chapter in our lives and we just wana do all the 'enjoying' first before the real 'work' begins.

used to be that i was apprehensive abt this, but now that it's actually gonna happen i'm kinda looking forward to it actually. i cant wait to see how it all pans out. i'm praying for us both to be given the strength to go through this period in our lives...may we emerge from it victorious...insyaAllah

food fiesta

2008-01-23T17:58:00.001+08:00

It would be stupid to be in phuket and not partake of the food, especially since there are SOO many halal options around. As much as possible, we tried to get our fix where the locals do – if the food’s good enough for the locals it would definitely do for us. But of course there were times when we’d be too tired to travel far, and eating joints in touristy areas (many many arab and indian muslim joints to be found) would do the job too.

som tham - mango salad
a must for every meal!

chicken green curry
a yummylicious treat when we were in phiphi

seafood fried rice
comfort food

seafood tom yum
to die for!!!!

sorry cant get enouff of som tham hehhe!

grilled fish..i like!

grilled sotong..nice!

pancake wif bananas (n sometimes wif nutella!)
another one of our sinful staples :P

phuket revisited

2008-01-19T14:14:00.000+08:00

this boy was in the mother's stomach the last time i saw him...heee. that was three years ago. we chanced upon this place while travelling ard on the motorbike. back then, we only made a pre-booking online for 2 nites at a place in patong, so we had to look ard for other accomodation. i'd actually made a list of places we could stay in, based on my research online, but they didnt quite come up to mark. dont get me wrong, i wasnt looking for some 5-star resorts, just a nice cosy place that's cheap.

the place looks quite nondescript actually. it lies on the hill along the main road linking patong to karon, and many would have given it a miss cos they'd be too busy concentrating on the uphill ride to notice it. we passed it on our way to karon and kata to check out the hotels there, and passed it again while on the way back. that's when we decided to stop cos the kapcai we were on was sputtering for dear life attempting the uphill ride.

we were greeted by a very frenly "good eveniiiiiiiiing" by an affable guy called joe, whom we later found out to be the owner of the place. we saw the rooms, LOVED the view, and immediately made bookings for the rest of our nites there. We were even contemplating extending our stay, but because we've already made plans to join our families in kl, we said our goodbyes reluctantly.

and the very next day, tsunami struck.

it was sobering. we had to entertain many many calls n sms-es from friends and relatives who still thought we were there, since we were not back in sg. and we were frantically trying to reach joe to see if he and his family was ok - his wife was pregnant then. and yes, they were all alrite, being on the hill. but we were affected, emotionally affected. we tried to do what we can with the efforts in sg, and spider had the opportunity to fly back to phuket to help with the relief efforts there.

so you could say phuket holds a special place in our hearts. we love the people, the food, the relaxing lifestyle of it all. yes it's way too commercialised, but look beyond the touts and you'll see people trying their best to make an honest living. yes there's too much debauchery but there are also many many pure things to be found there. like the magnificent views of minarets from the mosques littered around that never fails to make me gasp in awe.

so there we were again, 3 years later. we had a ball of a time, and we cant wait to go again.... "next time with yr children ok"...mrs joe's parting words to us :)

mr & mrs joe - the lovely owners

the aptly named hotel :)

~ S$50 per nite

change

2008-01-18T02:08:00.000+08:00

i suppose it's 18 days too late to be wishing everyone a happy new year. and kinda pointless to be doing reflections of the past year and resolutions for the next since the moment has come and gone. so i'll leave it at that.

and so my wish was fulfilled and i'm finally given a new posting...yeyy! it's not exactly what i had in mind but it's definitely way better than where i was before. the downside's that i've lost my partner-in-crime, my lunch buddy, my idea-bouncer and shopping partner, all at one go. that's the thing with postings and rotations. which used to scare me once. you get familiar with the colleagues around you and the working environment and before you know it, you have to start all over again.

so here i am in a new environment, if you can call being in another corner on the same floor different. then again you CAN call it different cos i'm now stuck in the middle of two very loud guys, one of whom thinks he's god's gift to women (which he's not). the dynamics here is different - it's a much bigger set-up and hence less cosy. but it's exciting and challenging, and it's in the thick of it all....so i'm raring to go!

in other news...i'm going off again next week, this time with the family. and we might just be going off somewhere for the cny hols next mth . suddenly the jet-setter arent i? :P

in other other news, i was suddenly struck by a huge 'maluuuuu' attack last night when i realised it's actually gonna happen. oh nooooo!!!!! *hides face in embarrassment*

we're ONE!

2007-12-21T18:21:00.000+08:00

am back from my blue-sky holiday..but more on that in the next post

in other news...we're ONE! cant believe how time flies when you're having fun..and had fun we did alrite.

so many things learned, experienced, discovered.

so many losses, wrenching painful heart-breaking losses, shared together.

so many things done, so much more yet to do.

i've said this before, and i'll say it again...i'm forever thankful for being given the opportunity to know you, to befriend you, to have you as my other half.

thank you for loving me, teaching me, cheering me on to be the best that i can be.

i love your eternally cheerful disposition. i love how you crack me up with your stupid jokes. i love your ever-enquiring mind and the many bits of knowledge that you have which never fails to suprise me.

i love YOU

our next year will definitely be an adventure of sorts. challenging...yes, but a challenge we'll ace through for sure, insyaAllah

here's to us sayang :)

sunny day

2007-12-04T19:39:00.000+08:00

so the other day we decided to wake up early early and ride about town. what better way to start the day than eggs and toast! decided to check out the sixth avenue joint that he’s been talking about….similar to ya kun but nicer he said..

then off we went with the wind in our faces. but thousands more had woken up way before us and congregated in town apparently, and by the time we got there, many were already on their way back!

and guess whose sweaty sticky self i bumped into exiting from the ladies with her ears all plugged up oblivious to anything but her own world?? the lady herself! the one whos been chronicling her journey in the masochistic world of long-distance running for all to see and left people like me feeling a tad guilty (just a tad) for not being as driven in the pursuit of that perfect weight

she’d completed her half-marathon..well done! next year full marathon ok :)

as for me, i just might (might being the operative word here) decide to take part in the triathlon next year. i HAVE been swimming every other day the last few days…does that count for something? :P

sleep

2007-11-23T01:39:00.000+08:00

so today marks the last day (for a while at least) i'll be having the bed all to myself. he's away the past few weeks, and i must say that it's been liberating. a fren said that it's akin to being single...minus the desolation that accompanies those who are lonely. we are alone, yes, but not lonely. do i make sense? nevermind.

strangely enough i've been deprived of much-needed sleep these few days. strange because i'd expected to sleep even longer since i had the luxury of space - me the puny one on a queen-size bed(!)...yeyyy! but yes. the tv and the net were too distracting...and so i allowed myself to be distracted by them. have i mentioned that youtube's addictive? make that potently addictive. and it doesnt help that the football matches were all shown at ungodly hours....

speaking of which, i'd never thought there'd come a day when i'd be supporting isr.ael in a match. and i didnt! i did 'not support' russia, i did want russia to lose, but it's not the same as me supportig is.rael ok. same same but different. i stayed up to not support russia, and in the end, i was rewarded with england being kicked out? thanks. so whats the point of me staying up all those nights again?

and so now i'm severely deprived of sleep, and i'm still here. i HAVE to get rid of my panda eyes so that i'll look ravishing later today when i pick him up from the airport, but i'm still here! it's a big mistake having your laptop in bed - or at least thats what the experts say...something abt not doing any non-sleeping activities in bed cos yr mind will be conditioned to not go to sleep even after you're ready to sleep cos you're in bed and being in bed = doing your non-sleeping activity

ok now i'm rambling. i have to sleep!

oh but before i go a shout out to the top psle student wif the highest score ever in the history of the psle...woohoo! you go girl! melayu boleh!

ok i have to sleep. nites!

the latest it bag

2007-11-13T00:48:00.000+08:00

speaking of all things green, fancy carrying this bag about town?

'pakcik' (cos he ALWAYS calls me 'makcik') has found an ingenious way of putting the humble rice bag to good use. as he said, his current carrier of choice is "very durable you know...can carry 10kg one". and he's right too.

finally...an it bag i can afford!

going green

2007-11-10T18:16:00.000+08:00

this wasnt inspired by the go green movement thats been in the news recently, but ever since we've moved to cg we've been separating the plastic bottles from the glass ones from the paper carton boxes from the metal cans from the rest of the rubbish in our kitchen trashbag - our very small contribution to making this world of ours last that little bit longer

(sidenote: i find this a bit hard to reconcile initially cos we all know that dunia akan kiamat eventually so why go thru all that trouble to stop the inevitable? and then i realised that just because something's inevitable doesnt mean that you cant do anything to make your life and the life of others better. it's just like dying - we all know we'll die someday but that doesnt mean we go around trying to kill ourselves. hmmm ok my attempt at explaining's not going anywhere. back to topic..)

it helps that the recycling bins are close by. every once in a while we'll trudge down to the bins wif the various things and the pile of newspapers, and we'll often get curious stares from patrons of the food centre beside which the bins are located. and very often we'll find the bins empty. either the recycling companies have been very diligent in clearing the bins, or people have not been making use of the bins.

IF people have not been making use of the bins, i can understand why. it's really no easy feat separating your trash. as i'm writing this, there are 4 empty coke bottles, 2 olive oil glass bottles, 1 orange juice carton, 1 milk carton and 1 pasta glass jar waiting to be disposed. they're all sitting 'nicely' beside my waste bin, and they make an unsightly mess. there are times when im tempted to just dump them in the bin, and i've done that on a couple of occassions. so, recycling is hard work.

a japanese friend we know was happily showing off her rubbish chute when we went for her housewarming. this rubbish chute is similar to the ones found in hdb flats, you know, the ones wif the small door covering a hole that leads straight down the chute. "you just open the door and throw yr rubbish!" she said gleefully, demonstrating this by throwing a piece of tissue paper down the chute. and i tell you, she was deliriously, positively, happy about it.

it was all very amusing, but we couldnt understand why. then she explained that back in japan, they had to separate their rubbish (it's a law or something). in fact, the rubbish collectors would even refuse to collect your rubbish if it's not separated. which was why she was soo happy wif the rubbish chute - throwing rubbish wont be such a chore anymore!

maybe rubbish throwing has been made too easy for us singaporeans. perhaps if we had been MADE to separate our rubbish, it'd be second nature to us and we wouldnt think twice about recycling.

we'll continue wif our 'hard' work. hopefully it'll be second nature to us some day.

it's been crazy

2007-11-09T16:06:00.001+08:00

there are a million and one things left for me to do, i've yet to upload the tons of photos from my camera, and yet i'm here, offloading. hahha

its been a crazy couple of weeks. at work, we had this huge event that never failed to give us a major headache every couple of years. and preparations started way before, wif reports to be done ad nauseum. what have we done the last few years? what will we be doing the next couple of years? and more importantly, how will doing all these things help WORKERS?

it's easy to be carried away by the numbers game, but it's hard sometimes to know what it was you're working towards cos it's all so macro and big-picture. i yearn for the time when i could do what i do best (at least i think i'm very good at it), which was....getting down and dirty fighting for the common man. the satisfaction is immense, and you dont have to do reports and projections for that. you just do your groundwork, fight your fight, and move on to the next case. will i ever be given the opportunity to go back to this? chances are..nope...cos they need specialists...and being at the wrong place at the wrong time kinda made me one.

and then of cos there's the hari raya visiting, and receiving visitors to our place. it's been crazy cooking for them, tho we're not complaining cos we love feeding our guests. but since there's only 2 of us, you can imagine how crazy it's been. have i mentioned that it's crazy? hehhe ok thats like my favourite word of the moment.

anyways..the other day as we were leaving the house we bumped into a few 'unearthly' creatures

since many of my neighbours are foreigners, they really got into the whole halloween trickortreat thingy. i know halloween's not exactly our thing, but it was fun seeing the whole neighbourhood transformed, wif candles and pumpkins and cobwebs and skeletons and witches and monsters running everywhere...heee

being the housewife | raya greetings

2007-10-25T21:00:00.000+08:00

so it's been more than a month since my last post. it's not for lack of ideas, i can tell you that. i've gone "i shd blog abt that!" so many times i've lost count. then life hits you at full speed and by the time you're done you'd be too tired to do anything else but vege or sleep.

which leaves me wondering how all those people can manage blogging on a daily basis. not that i'm complaining of cos (i'm a closet blog-reader that way), but i do wonder. they're definitely more wired that i am, is all i can say.

i took a few days off work during ramadhan to prepare for the festivities, but of cos the main reason was that i felt like it..hehhe. and so for the first time in my 6 years in the organisation i've utilised all of last year's leave entitlement, and even used up 1.5 days of leave for this year! gasp! which means that i wont be starting next year with 42 days of leave to my name! double gasp!

but it's not all bad actually. i do like being the housewife. you get to wake up late. and you get to do things like do the laundry and water the plants at a leisurely pace on sunny mornings instead of doing them at night or rushing them over the weekends. and you get to join the throng of taitais wif their domestic helpers in tow doing their grocery shopping at the supermarket, so much so that you begin to feel like a taitai yourself even though you'd prolly be mistaken as the helper. which is fine too cos theres nothing more reassuring than a frenly smile from a kindred spirit to get you through your mental tussle at the shelves - this coffee brand or that? the house barnd's olive oil or the slightly more expensive one?

and i finally get why those housewives you see on tv would always greet their husbands with open arms when they're back from work...after having my own company for most of the day i too was at the door welcoming spider back the moment i hear the roar of his bonny coming up the driveway..hehhe.

so anyways, its been many days already, but we do have many more days left of the month...

so here's wishing all of you selamat hari raya.....maaf zahir dan batin...

drying news | sofa set for sale

2007-09-16T13:17:00.000+08:00

i hate it when i have to use the hairdryer to read my news

we have the bench outside where the papers can be kept high and dry, but noooo....the wet soggy walkway is still the newspaper man's favourite spot of choice. the same thing happened last week, when my papers were soaked through n through, and i had to make my way to the nearby shell station to get a fresh copy of my fix.

this time round, i refuse to give in. if i have to blowdry my way to get to the news, i'll blowdry my way to get to them. hmmph!

in other news, we're selling our newly-acquired 3+3+1 bamboo balinese sofa set for $400, excluding delivery. it's a great set, but we're giving it up nevertheless cos it wasnt really what we had in mind...hehhe.

those of you who are itching to spruce up yr homes for the coming raya...this is yr chance! more pictures are up in my multiply. interested parties drop me a mail yah :)

2007-09-16T02:21:00.000+08:00

it's 220 in the morning and we're both still up n about, high from the ride to and from hy.de park where we met our motley group of riders and then some for a catch-up and sharing photos session. quite funny if you ask me. one second you're in the mosque performing the terawih and the next you're surrounded by people whose beverage of choice is the one thing you're abstaining yourself from.

anyways, the photos of our trip are up if you're interested.

we're both inspired to do something abt our lawn, which has been neglected for some time now. theres a bit on gardening in st's life today (or rather...yesterday?) which had us all excited. we've been wanting to grow our own herbs for the longest time (jamie oliver anyone?), but we never got around to doing it. our jaunt to hyd.e park sealed it for us. the grounds were nicely done up, with lush greenery everywhere. they even hv a pool at the back! which reminded me of my neighbour's...which was sadly torn down when they moved away...

the possibilities are endless it's gonna be a lot of work, but we hv to start somewhere. and seeing as to how raya's coming in a few weeks' time, it's as good a time as any to start yah. so...jalan kayu nurseries here we come!

have a great ramadhan y'all!

about that negaraku hoohah

2007-08-21T00:31:00.001+08:00

i was wondering what all the fuss was about. afterall, it's not uncommon for the man on the street to make his gripes and grouses heard, even if it's in the form of a video that's posted on youtube for the world to see.

i finally got to see it, the one with the english translation. i found it initially amusing. who couldnt identify wif corrupt officials and inefficient government right? but then he started making fun of race and religion, to the point of being insulting.

and i was insulted. incensed even. how dare he made such remarks and expect to get away wif it! imagine if this had been abt m.ajulah singapu.ra. he'd prolly be charged wif sedition from the word go.

he's apparently apologised. twice. but i wonder if he'd really meant it. i suspect that people like him will not change their positions quite so readily, no matter how much counselling they get, cos this is deep-rooted - one's perception of other races, other religions.

judge for yourself. watch the video.

then again, don't.

pottery finale

2007-08-20T10:56:00.001+08:00

i got my hands on this, courtesy of spider (or rather, spider's student, who had to grudgingly lend his piece to his teacher when said teacher spotted him with one..hehhe). and i finished it over the weekend! yeyy!

i kinda hate the '19 years later' part though. it's a bit too neat for my liking. i'd have ended it the moment voldermort was vanquished. but that's just me.

and i'm feeling kinda smug knowing that my trust in snape was not misplaced. heeeee

i'm back

2007-08-13T11:06:00.001+08:00

heyheyhey

happy (belated) national day y'all!

why we chose to rent

2007-08-07T23:32:00.000+08:00

a friend was lamenting abt how some american guy who bought his home last year is making her all jittery abt making her property purchase decision

".....for some time now we have been reading up on the US sub-prime housing loans which came to the very much expected crash last week..now some of my colleagues (boy was i surprised a lot of these science teachers have been tuning in to the world of $ ) started talking to me about another possible downturn in the economy, exposure of our economy to the US, MAS chekcing on local banks on exposure to CODs..the interest rate in singapore, singapore dollars pegged to cant remember what and baskets of goods..

acck..now i wish i had done the minor in business in my last year in uni..coz i cant remember that much of my econs..
we were fine and confident coz we have worked out our sums and will be getting a relatively small and comfortable amount of loan so that our mortgage will be nicely paid off by cpf only. so we will be meeting the lawyers today but now i have a sinking feeling and a big question mark on how the american with a bad credit rating who bought his house on a sub-prime rate will affect our purchase.

so the science teachers are advising me to hold?
hold or let go n buy a new one?....."

Since i AM a bizad grad i shall put in my 2cents worth..ehem.. :P

All things being equal spore's economy's supposed to be on a high for the next few years. we're gona hv f1 next year, a sure boost to the economy. and we have the marina ir ready by 2009? n the sentosa ir ready the yr after that? so all these are supposed to be money spinners for the economy, hence the rosy picture.

We've been doing a lot of house-hunting ourselves...partly cos we were worried abt the rising property prices. we figured it's gonna go up n up for the next few years, so better buy now when the price is high, rather than later when the price is higher. but the ridiculously high cov is putting us off. we're NOT gonna be spending so much money ABOVE valuation for a place just becos the property market’s super hot right now. what’s gonna happen when the market comes crashing down? Which will happen one day eventually cos these things go through a cycle, no? we’d be paying through our teeth then for something that’s gonna be worth two-thirds of what it was?

So our house-hunting has sorta cooled down now. nothing to do with the us mortgage crisis, just our unwillingness to fork out so much money

But the US mortgage crisis is scary eh. we’ve always lulled ourselves into thinking that we’ve decoupled our economy from the US, after the unfortunate incident of the asian financial crisis. But the reality is that we’re still as linked to the US economy as we were back then. And even though the issue is as remote as it could ever be – whoever thought that a company’s unwise decisions to give mortgage loans to those who are not credit-worthy would affect us millions of miles away! – we’re feeling the repercussions now.

Which brings me to my main point: rent

Attended a workshop last week and the trainer was telling us that it’s very bewildering how everyone’s rushing to buy a home the moment they got married. And that before they even knew it, they’d be ‘upgrading’ to a bigger flat. A few years down the road, upgrade again to maybe a condo, then again to landed property after that. Owning a piece property seems to be our endless pre-occupation – the bigger the better. and may I just add – the more expensive, the more mired in debt we’ll be? Sounds pessimistic, but it’s true. How many of us truly have the means to own our home? There’ll be those lucky souls who’d pay off their homes with cash in hand. But the rest of us have no choice but to finance our home with a loan, and the loans will just add up after every ‘upgrading’ exercise. The end result: living in debt for the rest of our lives.

Which is why we’ve chosen to rent our first home. Some of the older folks, and even a few of the younger ones, have questioned the sensibility of our decision. After all, rental eats away at your disposable income, and you’d end up having less money to spend on other essentials like food, bills and such. BUT, renting our home also means that our CPF has not been depleted as yet, and could be made to work even harder than the measly returns that we’re getting at the moment (that is, if you invest yr cpf monies).

Plus purchasing a piece of property is such a grown-up thing to do isnt it, and we're just not ready to be grown up as yet. And stop sniggering there...we know we're both no longer in our 20s, but we still feel young yah :P

We will of course eventually make our first property purchase, InsyaAllah. The lease to our current place expires in 2 years' time, and we've already been told that there'll be no chance of renewing it cos the govt's taking it back (though we never take NO for an answer, so we're still hopeful..hehhe). There's still time till then to make the purchase.

2007-08-06T14:22:00.001+08:00

It’s kinda liberating zipping across town on the triumph at 4.45 in the morning. The cold wind against my face. The occasional odd folks we met on the road.

The destination – Jurong. The task – to drive the wish and its load to melaka, for an onward ferry journey to dumai, which is in Indonesia btw (in case you’re as clueless as me)

We made it back home by 2pm. Not too bad eh, this chauffering thingy.

In a few days time, we’ll be zipping across town on the triumph again, at 5.15 in the morning. Only this time, we’ll be zipping across the border too, and exploring roads and trails we’ve never explored before. I cant wait!

potty potter

2007-08-03T19:38:00.001+08:00

i finally got my hands on a copy of this. no you havent got it wrong... it IS the half-blood prince that i'm referring to, not the deathly hallows that everyone's excited about. i've never bought a harry potter book in all my life, and i remembered resolutely sticking to this when the book was released back then.

this copy's courtesy of my niece. hehhe. i'm cheapo like that.

i dont think snape's as evil as everyone thinks he is. dumbledore's not that stupid. ok ok sorry this conjecture is way past its expiry date cos EVERYONE knows what happens next. but i havent read te book have i so i have every right to wonder..hahha!

now i cant wait to get my hands on the final book. anyone wants to lend it to me???

i cant believe it’s august already

2007-08-02T16:34:00.000+08:00

“You mean we’ve only got 5 months left till the end of the year?” – my exact reaction when spider pointed it out to me yesterday. Whatever happened to the 7 months? How how how now? There are TONS of things to do, TONS of things to be completed, before we embark on our huge project next year. And there’s still the house to do up.

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Our neighbour across the driveway served their notice way before their lease expired, and held a gar.age sale yesterday to sell off their humungous collection of items. Being the nosey cheapo neighbours that we were, spider and me had already ‘choped’ quite a few of their items way before they even went on sale. Yes we’re kiasu like that. So anyways, yesterday was the day when we had to pay up and lug the items back to our house. And boy the house was turned to a dreadful mess, not that it wasn’t messy enough to begin with.

The neighbour was amused. She asked if we enjoyed decorating, and we sheepishly said that we’ve wanted to do that since day one but never got the time. “today is as good a time as any to start, since your house is now a mess” – said she in a straight face, though I swore I could hear the note of amusement in her voice.

But she’s right of cos. Now’s as good a time as any. The big mess totally revved us up. We were awake till 2am this morning moving things around the house. For one, our corridor’s much cleaner and less cluttered. The bbq grill is now neatly placed just beside our newly acquired cupboard, which now houses some of our shoes, soil, fertilizer, helmets, gardening shears, and charcoal. And there are now just 2 shoe racks outside, when previously there were 5. We’ve removed the plant-less pots with the dried-up soil (note to self: get going on yr planting already!), and have introduced 2 more additions to our VERY MODEST collection of plants, again courtesy of the gara.ge sale.

The inside of the house is another story. We have more furniture than we have space. we’ve tried moving things around, but it’s still work-in-progress. The space where our dining table used to be has now been converted to our tv-cum-lounging space. And it’s reasonably done up now, with 3/7 of our newly-acquired sofa set placed nicely there. but of course this would mean that we’d have to put the dining set at the place where the tv used to be, and the old sofa is still there. add to that the other 4/7 of the sofa set which still has no space to call its own, and the coffee table that comes along with the set, and you can imagine the mess the house is in right now.

Like I said, it’s work-in-progress. A headache-inducing, back-breaking, muscle-toning, work-in-progress. But hey, at least I get my exercise.

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It’s amazing how similar our mental models are.
Name the first flower that comes to your mind –chances are, it’ll be rose.
Name a piece of furniture – chances are, it’ll either be a table, or chair, or bed.
And the waiting game entry has everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, asking “so so so, are you pregnant??”

Well, the waiting has ended. Alhamdulillah, I can breathe easy now.

And no dearies, I’m NOT pregnant. We’re not ready, and we’re not trying.
When we are, ready that is, we pray that God will see us worthy to be blessed with kids
And when we are, pregnant that is, we’ll definitely be sharing the good news with those who care :)

the waiting game..

2007-07-24T15:15:00.000+08:00

..is unbearable. am i? or am i not?

i really hope i'm not. then again, it’s a GOOD thing isn’t it, and who am i to refuse a good thing when it comes knocking my way?

the waiting game is unbearable

ode to a tree

2007-07-19T00:40:00.000+08:00

this grand old tree was chopped down on sunday. i couldnt help but feel all riled up abt it. spider was angrier - after all the tree was just across from his workplace.

what made it even more 'remarkable' was the reason given for chopping it down - that it could pose a danger to road users because they've not been observing the speed limit (!!). err...come again???

i would think that if road users were not observing the speed limit, then one would go after the road users. then again that's just me.

there was an online letter to st by some brilliant guy that i thought was worth replicating...

July 18, 2007

A parting letter from Ang Sar Nah

My dear beloved humans,

By the time you read this, I would not only be dead, but I would also be mutilated to unrecognisable chunks of wood and heaps of sawdust. It's okay, because life still goes on. There was no way of turning back.

I've lived a fulfilling life. I've stood tall for over a hundred years. I've seen the development of Pek Shan Teng from a humble Cantonese cemetery to what Bishan is all about now.

As a young sapling, I admit to competing with the other trees to get sunlight and nourishment. I must say that I have been lucky on a few occasions.

Some of my fellow friends like Rain Tree and Frangipani were uprooted in their teenage years to make way for graves.

I was lucky. I was out of the beaten path and was spared the changkols and saws because where I stood, the fengshui was not exactly ideal for the departed to rest.

Graveyard diggers, coolies and undertakers would seek refuge under my shade after a hard day's work on the hilly cemetery grounds.

Every Qingming in March/April, hordes of families would dutifully come over to Pek Shan to pay their respects to their dearly departed. Some families would even leave food and plant joss sticks around me.

I suppose they were paying respects to me, or honouring me. Come to think of it, it was funny how I was revered by the masses of religiously-struck humans. I appreciated that. I continued to flourish and grow. I've received many guests on my leaves and branches. Did I mention a tiger once used me as a scratching post? A travelling hornbill from Sarawak roosted on my branches for a few months to recuperate from the long journey.

I've even had the honour of being the home to a colugo (flying lemur) that gave birth to twins!

Then the Government decided in the 1970s to develop Pek Shan Teng. First, it renamed the area Bishan, in line with the hanyu pinyin efforts then. The heavy machinery came and exhumed the graves of many Cantonese ancestors. The cemetery in some areas were levelled. Again, I was lucky to have missed the excavation and clearing of the land.

Then I also witnessed a geopolitical shift in where I was supposed to be located. Not that I was transplanted, but the Government on one hand said I belonged to Bishan, then one day mentioned I belonged to another GRC. Last I heard, I think I belonged to Aljunied or Marine Parade. In any case, I witnessed boomtime in the 80s when Bishan experienced a huge surge of residents coming to live in the New Town. I also saw Raffles Institution and later Raffles Junior College moving just a stone's throw from where I stood.

Urban sprawl was also the reason to expand the transport network. Braddell Road became more congested as it was the main trunk road that brought the Bishan residents to other parts of Singapore. Planners decided to widen Braddell Road as part of the Outer Ring Road System. Cutting across underneath was the Circle Line MRT system. The drawing plans had me demarcated as an 'obstruction to road widening plans'. Someone wanted me to be felled. I was already more than a hundred years old then, and I've seen everything - well, almost.

But there was someone else who championed for my existence and fought his way to get me saved. They came up with an ingenious temporary traffic scheme so that traffic would be diverted safely around me while they kept to the posted speed limit of 40 kmh. I mentioned that I've seen it all, including the few reckless and irresponsible drivers who would violate the 40 kmh limit. They would zoom past me, thinking that the diversion made a good Formula One-type of chicane or dogleg.

I prayed for them, and for the many other responsible drivers who were endangered by these selfish and reckless punks.

For two short years, I literally stood in the middle of the road, relishing once again my stay from the chainsaws. I've got the policymakers to thank.

But they decided to overturn their decision, amid the international call to 'Go Green' and to 'Save the Trees'. How ironic.

Now they blame me for being a potential hazard to drivers who speed and don't adhere to simple safety rules to slow down.

Who's going to watch over them now? Who's going to pray for these irresponsible drivers?

I don't want to point my branches to who's at fault for 'near misses and accidents'.

I'm but a 'lucky' tree to almost everyone who sees me standing on that small island in the middle of Braddel Road.

Like I said earlier: there's no way of turning back. The decision was made to execute me and to allow for 'free flow' of traffic. I was once told that I was a good reason for traffic-calming measures in the area. I guess it's not the case now.

I am only an Angsana Tree - a tree gone by the time you read this - but I have a few things to say. And this is the only time I'm mentioning anything to anyone in my more than a hundred years of living on this planet.

Please educate your drivers and enforce your rules with the right frame of mind, and with professionalism. There is always the easy way out in coming up with solutions, but there are many other more innovative ways. I have submitted to the fact that I need to make way for national development. At my expense, I will do my part if that's the only choice for the sake of safety.

Alas, I'm disappointed that the very issue of responsible driving is not addressed. It's too late for me to fathom how my demise will result in safer driving when the very root of the problem is not addressed on a national level. Oh, well, life must go on.

I appreciate the nature lovers who have tried their best to keep me alive, but my time has come to bid adieu to all my friends.

Please continue to pray - on my behalf - for the selfish and inconsiderate drivers who endanger the lives of others.

Finally, please drive carefully.

Your friend,
Ang Sar Nah

Timber anyone?

777

2007-07-07T13:52:00.000+08:00

so the dust has settled. its been a couple of weeks. we're back to work. and everyone save a few is oblivious to my grief, not that i mind, but yah sometimes i just want to be left alone you know. you dont really feel like joining in the jokes, or being up to date with the latest office gossip.

but jokes and gossip's part of everyday life, and essential if you want to get your life back on track. so yes, we're ok now. life goes on.

i couldnt resist making an entry today :)

we sorta entertained the idea of getting married on this very date, but rejected it straightaway after realising we'd have to wait even longer before getting hitched. great decision if you think about it now. his mum's able to see the last of her children settle down before breathing her last breath. my grandparents got to see me get married before they left us.

we planned on riding to mersing today, but we woke up this morning to a storm, so our plan's kinda scuppered. we're still in two minds about making the ride there, but you never know

loss

2007-06-25T16:06:00.000+08:00

There’s the double-bill wedding and the kl trip that I’ve yet to talk about. And my befday treat. And our bid to purchase our first home. But all these will have to wait.

My mother-in-law passed away last Sunday evening. And my grandfather followed suit in the wee hours of Wednesday morning. Probably to join my grandmother, who passed away 2 months ago.

I think of all the lost opportunities to do good to my grandparents, and I cry. Have I made their lives comfortable these last few years? Have I made them happy? It’s too late now to learn from nyai how to make her famous minyak urat. And will I ever get the chance to taste su’un daging masak kicap as wonderful as hers? Or her rendang daging, which she’d faithfully cook for us everytime we get together, even when she wasn’t feeling well? Atok is forever reminding us to stay united together, that blood is thicker than water, and that no matter what the problems are, we’ll be able to overcome them if we stay together. Will this legacy of his remain now that he’s gone?

I think of my late mother-in-law, and I cry. I was slowly getting closer to her, but 6 months was too short a time for me. Have I made her happy, or did I disappoint her in any way? How do I be a good daughter-in-law, when there’s no parent-in-law to be good to? I wish I had told her earlier that I’m forever thankful to her, for bringing up a son as wonderful as him. I wish I could tell her that I’ll be good to her son.

I wish I could have shown my kids to her, and to atok and nyai.

But these are wishful thinking. They’re gone now, as He had wanted. It breaks my heart, but all things must come to an end, and I am redha. We’re all redha.

Semoga roh atok, nyai dan mak dicucuri rahmat sentiasa, insyaAllah.

30 going on 13

2007-06-04T17:51:00.000+08:00

i'm 30 today

but i feel 13 :)

back on d running track

2007-05-28T17:04:00.001+08:00

I had my afternoon jog during lunch today, after many weeks of absence. Am all inspired after witnessing for myself the myriad of people who slogged themselves out to complete the race last weekend. The look on their faces when they crossed the finish line was priceless, and I got to thinking, if they can do it, why not me. So…jogging today. And maybe swimming tomorrow? We’ll see hehhhe.

In the meantime…enjoy the pics yah!

some cheer our way

2007-05-23T16:34:00.000+08:00

It’s been close to a month since the last entry. We had one more incident in the family since then – my poor cousin had a head-on collision with a bus while on her way to school. Yes she rides, and yes it’s eerie cos it’s close to the death anniversary of our other cousin, but no she didn’t end up THAT way. She’s now thanking her lucky stars that she had somehow miraculously escaped certain death – all courtesy of her trusty helmet. And though she was lying unconscious in ICU for 3 days and had her head completely shaven off so that they could insert tubes into her brain, she’s now finally home, intact, and recovering. Yes it’s gonna be a long, drawn-out process before you’re finally back to normal but we all know how strong you are dearie, so hang in there and keep fighting ok!

My grandfather’s getting better now, in fact much much better, alhamdulillah. He’s able to move his left hand and leg now, and he’s even starting to walk again! His speech’s no longer slurred, he’s able to feed himself…he’s really improved by leaps and bounds. And strangely enough, the episode has brought home to me the importance of insurance, most specifically el.dershi.eld, which is something that I’m looking at currently in the course of my work. Coincidence? Perhaps. But I’m definitely able to appreciate this more. And i’m more convinced that people should not be opting out of this when they’re given the option once they turn 40. But that’s a story for another day.

We’ve been so occupied these last few weeks that we kinda forgot that we’re gonna have another wedding in the family come early June. 2 of my cousins are getting married! Now that things have settled down, we’re all gearing ourselves up for the big event. It’s not often that we have a double wedding yah. The family has really bonded together in this difficult time, and I think we all deserve some cheer in our lives right about now. Even grandfather’s looking forward to it :)

As for me, I’ve been busy with work, and family. But we managed to squeeze some time in between to rough it out in the open seas. THAT was an adventure I’d not soon forget. We’re heading someplace near this weekend, since he’ll be there the whole of next week for work anyway. We’re opportunists that way :)

those 2 weeks

2007-04-25T16:11:00.000+08:00

My grandfather was hospitalized on 11 april 2007, after a bad fall in the toilet. He suffered a stroke on his left side of his body. I wasn’t prepared for the scene that greeted me when I visited him in hospital that day. Gone was the strong, dignified-looking man who had the whole family – all 12 children, god knows how many grandchildren and 3 great-grandchildren, under his command. He was a pale version of his old self. He was very weak, his vision was blurred, his speech incoherent at times. He was totally dependent on others to move around, even if moving means lifting his leg, or scratching an itch, or changing his body position in bed. I was heartbroken. I was humbled. Such is the power of God – to reduce a man to such a state.

And then a few days later, on Saturday 14 april 2007, my grandmother, his wife, passed away.

She passed away peacefully, while in her sleep. It was mid-afternoon, and I was bringing the laundry in when I received the news. It took some frantic calls before it was confirmed. Yes, my grandmother, my beloved grandmother, has passed away. Who would have thought? While we were all concerned with my grandfather, it was her who was taken away from us first.

In retrospect, it was perhaps fortunate that she passed away when she did. If my grandfather were not hospitalized, we would probably not get to see her in her last few days. It’s precisely because of our daily hospital visits that all her children staying in Singapore, most of her grandchildren, and all her great-grandkids got to see her in her last few days. Alhamdulillah. Whoever would have thought that that huge hug I gave her that Friday night would be the last with her ever?

It has been difficult these few days. I suppose the whole family’s not been able to go through the whole cycle of grief cos we have our grandfather still to look after. So we soldiered on. Even while her body was on the way to be buried, some of us were accompanying our grandfather back to hospital. And keeping him company there, which meant that we were not around to accept all the condolences passed our way. We act like things are normal. We talk positive and sound positive. Just so we could lift up our grandfather’s sagging spirits, so he can get better.

But we can’t be there all the time, and we feel guilty for it. I feel guilty when I leave him at night at the hospital, but life has to go on. And then I feel selfish for thinking that. Which makes me feel guilty all over again.

But really, the best thing I can do for him, and for my arwah grandmother, is to pray for them. Pray that my grandfather gets well soon and is blessed with good health for many years to come. And sedekahkan al-fateha to my arwah grandmother, semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat.

Alhamdulillah, my grandfather appears to be getting out of the melancholy that’s been engulfing him the past week. All might soon be well, insyaAllah….

the off-peak warriors

2007-04-11T12:38:00.000+08:00

Read abt the opc phenomenon in st the other day (opc = off-peak cars. These cars can only be used from 7pm-7am on weekdays, from 3pm on Saturdays, and the whole day on Sundays). Apparently there are now 25,000 of such cars on the road today, more than 3 times the figure just a decade ago. I remembered way back when the opc was first introduced, my dad bought himself a brand new opc car – a proton saga. We called it the ‘batman’ car, cos it can only move about at night. We had the proton for only a while – that was a period when my dad was changing cars like he was changing his shirts. I thought the opc phenomenon had died down, cos we didn’t see many of those on the roads back then. Which made sense cos even an opc car then would have cost a bomb – the coe prices then were not as low as they are now. With coe prices at record lows now, an opc car could cost as low as $25,000 (for smaller models like d kelisa). which makes it all the more affordable now. which would also explain the rise in the number of opc cars on the road.

Our swift is an opc, and we’re damm happy with it. Some have asked why we had bought an opc when we could jolly well afford a ‘normal’ one, and our response has always been: “why not?”

We got a straight $17,000 discount off the price because it’s an opc. And our road tax is just a mere $80 compared to the $880 that we’d have to fork out every year if it’s ‘normal’. I don’t drive to work - there’s no way I would do that cos parking would cost me $250 a month (yes my office parking is EXPENSIVE, even for staff), and that’s before all the erp and cbd charges that I’d have to pay. And spider doesn’t need to drive cos he has his trusty bike which he would still insist on riding even if we have a ‘normal’ car. By the time we go anywhere, it’d be after 7 anyway, when we can use the car. And even then, we sometimes take the bike cos riding on the triumph is just so nice and parking is never a headache with a bike, right?

Which begs the question: why do we even get a car in the first place?? :P

Well, the car does come in handy when we have stuffs to carry. Like when we do our groceries. Or when we do our shopping. Or when we had to transport my stuffs from my home in simei to cg. And it comes in handy when we’re driving people around, like my mil for instance, or my nieces and nephews, or even my own brothers. And it comes in handy when we’re tired and don’t feel like riding on the bike – cos riding on a bike requires a lot of concentration from you yah, not to say driving doesn’t lah, but it’s relatively easier.

There are instances when you need to use the car during the ‘peak’ hours though, and that’s when the opc coupons come in. these coupons cost $20 each, and they look real ugly cos they’re huge and gaudy. But that’s precisely their purpose I suppose, since they’re meant to be spotted easily on the roads.

All in, we’re very happy with our opc. It does the work, and most importantly, it’s cheap! My only wish is that they allow the cars to be used on Saturdays from 7am onwards, instead of from 3pm onwards as is currently the case. That would be happiness! :)

it's summons time!

2007-04-06T14:33:00.000+08:00

A few months ago, during the hari raya season, my mil was feeling rather thirsty, and badly needed something to drink. So my bil stopped the car at the side of the road and went to the 7-11 nearby to get her something to drink. A cisco officer came along, saw the car, and promptly went ahead to make a summons, totally ignoring my mil in the car who was desperately trying to catch his attention by calling out to him and waving her hands at him. Now we have no qualms with the fine – we did something wrong (parking at a double yellow line, even if for a really short time for a perfectly good reason with a person still in the car, is definitely WRONG) so we ought to be fined for that, but what really pissed us off was the attitude and behaviour of the officer. He was clearly bent on making the summons, and was so ‘intent’ on his job that even the cries of a helpless old lady in the car would not move him. What if my mil was crying to him for help?? Would he have helped her, or would he ignore her as he did then? My bet is on the latter.

This morning, we decided to have our breakfast at the cheese prata shop, beside fong seng. There were many cars parked along the road, though there were jagged yellow lines, but that’s ok (or so we thought) cos apart from the cars parked there and the occasional traffic, the road’s close to empty. What do you know, a few minutes into our breakfast, our friendly cicso guy comes along in his trusty scooter to give summons to all and sundry. It was irritating. Damm irritating. Yes technically the cars weren’t supposed to be parked there, but were they obstructing traffic? What traffic?? It was a lazy Friday morning, a public holiday morning, and there was definitely no heavy traffic. You know…once upon a time there used to be this little thing called “give and take”, but this is non-existent in the vocabulary of those cisco guys. To them, the more summons they make, the better. Probably cos they’re paid according to the number of summonses they make. And so I’m bloody pissed.

And what about the incident a few days ago of the guy who were harassed by 2 cisco officers which was reported in the papers? Apparently the guy caught the officers parking their vehicle illegally, and so proceeded to take a picture of the offending vehicle with his camera. What do you know, the 2 officers then confronted him and insisted that he delete the photo. The guy refused though, cos he insisted that it was within his right to take photos in a public area, and he stood his ground (yeyy for him!). the cicso guys kept harassing him, and threatened to call the police. In fact, both parties threatened to call the police (again, yeyy for the guy!!), and so the police were called in. to cut the story short, the police ruled that the guy did nothing wrong by taking the picture as it’s in a public place, but that the cisco guys did nothing wrong either for parking the vehicle illegally cos they were allowed to do that in the course of their work.

My beef is this: why did the cisco guys act in such a high-handed manner, insisting that the photo be deleted?? They knew they did nothing wrong by parking their vehicle where they did, so why should they harass the guy? My only conclusion: they did that because they thought they could. They thought wearing the uniform gives them the power to incite fear in others. If I were in the guy’s shoes, my guess is I would prolly meekly heed the officers’ requests, thinking that I’d done something wrong. Or even if I thought I did nothing wrong, I would still accede to the officers’ demands cos I just wont want to aggravate matters. So I’m mighty proud of that guy who bravely stood his ground. We need more of him around so that the powers that be, real or otherwise, would not indiscriminately inflict their powers on us. So yes…YEYYYY for him!!

hippy me | domestic helpers

2007-04-05T11:02:00.000+08:00

I just read somewhere that cg was once voted singapore’s hippiest spot by a prominent female magazine. Hmmmmm…so I’m a hippy eh? Hehhhe

Anyways, theres been a bit of a buzz around the place lately, what with the government’s plans to reconvert the place to a hostel..and the petition put up by the residents, including us. We’re kind of unaffected actually cos we know we wont be staying there for long….but there’s no harm in lending your support to the common good yah. Though at times it does feel a bit sayang to know that the place will not be available to us for much longer, should we choose to renew our lease. We’ve decided not to have the wooden platforms at the yard cos our stay’s there not permanent anyway – it’s just gonna be money down the drain.

Both of us have been wanting to start on a little project of ours, but we’ve not gotten around to doing it yet. Which is frustrating. But there are tons of things to do at home, and by the time we reach home it’s already late and all we have time for is to eat and vege at the couch. And there’s nothing much we can do during weekends either, cos our relatives keep popping by to spend time there since they love the place so much. Not that I’m complaining – like I said previously, I love it when there are people at my place. but sometimes you just want to be left alone yah so that you can finally unpack all those boxes and do up the place properly.

I still want to do the project though. Let’s hope we’ll find some time this long weekend to finally do it.

______________________________

Read about the plight of domestic helpers in the papers last weekend, and it just pains my heart. Many of them have sacrificed being with their husband and kids so that they can earn enough to keep the family going. If only we can start according them the same respect as we accord all other professions. They’re here to work, not to be slaves. What is so wrong with giving them enough food to eat? Can you survive on just one slice of bread a day? I cant fathom the doings of some of us sometimes. And what about the often debated issue of giving some time off to your maids? Do YOU want to be locked up in your office the whole time you’re working there, even if the office is equipped with all the comforts of home? If you cant stand the idea of that, why should your helpers be treated any different?

This brings to mind a lengthy email that I sent to my boss – the big boss, about two years back. I’ve never written to him at this length before, but I was compelled to let him know how I felt cos I felt really strongly about it:

Hi [big boss],

Thought HRW did the right thing by releasing the report. Yes Singapore got some negative publicity from it, but I personally feel that many Singaporeans need to be given a jolt to wake them up to what's happening. It might just be that the report is blowing up the issue, and that instances of maid abuse might be considerably lesser than reported. However, this should not stop us from acknowledging that there is a problem.

It's just shameful that some maids here are treated the way they are - no off days, waking up before the rest of the family and working the whole day through till everyone has gone to bed, being shouted at for every wrong thing they do..the list goes on (and I've not even included instances of physical abuse!). Some Singaporeans think they 'own' their maids because they've paid good money for them. Many fail to realise that these workers are just that - workers, and should be treated as such, just like how Singaporeans as workers themselves would want to be treated by their companies.

As the [………………………….….], we should not be silent on this. We have the […........], but perhaps we might want to be more vocal in this issue? There was a guideline by Case(?) that suggests that maids be given 1 day off a month - perhaps [we] can push for that to be a statutory requirement instead. Yes abuses of this requirement would be hard to monitor, but at least something is in place to protect the maids. One recommendation made by the HRW report - that the $5,000 bond be removed, might be a good idea. Singapore employers paranoid of losing the $5k bond and hence impose ridiculously strict restrictions on their maids might then have less of a case to do so if there's no bond to lose.

One simple step which could go some way is to stop referring to these workers as 'maids' - the term is loaded with too many negative connotations. Many hv started using the term Foreign Domestic Workers (FDWs), but this is too much of a mouthful to be effective. Perhaps we can start referring to them as 'domestic helpers', or 'hired help' instead?

Just my 2-cents' worth...

swamped

2007-03-30T18:29:00.000+08:00

met up with one company at 10.30. then gobbled up lunch and made my way to tuas for another meeting at 1.30. the rain was pouring so hard i was amazed and very thankful that the cab driver could see what's in front of him, cos i certainlty couldnt. then rushed back to the office for another meeting with yet another company at 3.30. and one last meeting at 5.20.

these are working meetings. you do work, not sit-one-corner-and-pretend-to listen-but-you're-actually-dozing-off kind of meetings. these are meetings where you have to talk and talk, and negotiate, and propose, and come to some agreement between the parties involved. the kind of meetings that drain you, and make you thirsty, damm thirsty.

i'm tired. i'm swamped. my desk is a mess. and i desperately need a massage.

i'm heading home to bed. and that warm embrace.

gonzo

2007-03-29T12:09:00.000+08:00

I saw gonzo the other day. For the uninitiated, gonzo’s this guy I went out with for some time back when I first started working. You can say he’s my first ‘serious’ relationship. Looking back, it was laughable how naïve and susceptible I was back then to even the slightest attention from people of the opposite sex. I was extremely flattered that he wanted to go out with me, and therefore ignored the fact that he was EXTREMELY brash and cocky. Puspawangi, remember that time when I was crying my heart out at your bed in the hospital because of him?? Ridiculous eh when we think of it..hahha.

So anyway, saw him having dinner with his wife and son a few tables away from me and spider. And I told spider, that’s the guy who made me cry…who made use of me to while his time away…(I later suspected that he was probably in between relationships, or his girlfriend was not in Singapore during the period)...and who just stopped calling me when he had no more use for me.

And spider asked if I want him to go up to gonzo and give him an earful or even a bashing, cos he’d do that for me. And I realized that all things, even the bad ones, happen for a reason, and I didn’t end up with gonzo because I’m SUPPOSED to end up with spider. I felt like kissing and hugging him right there and then. Hehhe. Which I did, the hugging anyway, cos cannot kisskiss in public hokay wait the makciks around will shake their heads in disappointment and lament what’s gone wrong with the young today cos we look young like as if we’re dating even though we’re married already but we’ll keep ourselves in check so that makciks wont dosa for no reason. Muakakakaka

By the way, gonzo is short. And he’s not funny. And spider looks way better than him…hahh! Ok bitchy moment over :P

moving house

2007-03-20T14:25:00.001+08:00

Had a busy week last week. Worked on monday and thursday, took leave the rest of the days. Not to suka-suka enjoy the school hols wif spider, but to prepare the house. Moved my stuffs from simei to cg, painted the house, cleared the backyard, moved furniture around, sertu the kitchen and all the kitchen utensils and appliances….it was hard work, and I’m still recovering from it.

Had the doa selamat cum housewarming for our family on saturday. Tiring yes, but kinda fun too. I realize that I like having people over. Makes the house more lively. And we had an impromptu bbq at night...hahha!

Like I said…I’m still recovering from it all. There are tons yet to be completed, books and clothes yet to be unpacked. But you know what, I’m happy. I have my own place, my own set of rules. It comes with a whole lot of responsibilities– cleaning, washing, making sure the place is all locked up before I go to work, etc etc, but it is still MY place, OUR place, and we get to do whatever we want with it.

I’ll invite you girls over some time.

sleepy

2007-03-08T13:26:00.000+08:00

been rushing around like mad for meetings, slept at 4 the last couple of nites, all for the event this morning. and now it's all over.

i'm happy. and sleepy. am heading home to sleep.

to puspawangi (kuakuakua)...happy belated befday girl!

the quake

2007-03-06T20:02:00.000+08:00

the building swayed a bit, chairs shook a bit, and then came the evacuation announcement. fortunately this was just before 12, so everyone just went off for lunch.

oblivious me was too busy zipping around town going for meetings to partake of the drama, but was finally informed by the ever helpful colleagues who seized me while at lunch and warned me not to go back to the buidling becos "got evacuation one". and then i got a call from dad, who caught it on the news, and who cautioned me not to go back to the buidling cos you never know what'd happen next.

went back anyway, and i wasnt stopped. heard some more accounts of the tremors from other colleagues. all juicy yah (cos our poor singaporean lives are so lacking in drama), but i wonder if they spared a thought to the poor residents actually caught in the middle of it all. got back to my seat, steeling myself to get some work done.

and then i felt giddy, like as if a gentle wave just caught me. and then everyone around me said that was another tremor! waited for another announcement on the pa system, none came. till a few hours later. the police has advised that no evacuation is necessary, and that building tenants can choose to declare the rest of the days off at their own discretion.

which they did btw. heard of at least one tenant who dismisses their staff for the day. but not us. nooo of cos not us. the bosses were all somewhere else anyway, so no decision was made.

and so we toil in this glass cage of ours. which is thousands of times better than being stuck in the wreckage of the aftermath of the quake. i'm not complaining.

let's hope not many lives were lost.....

I want my sleep back!

2007-02-28T09:02:00.000+08:00

Came super early for a meeting, only to realise that it’s been cancelled! Arrrgh! I needed that extra sleep man. Yes I had earlier replied that I couldn’t attend the meeting, but that does not mean it’s ok not to let me know that it’s cancelled, because it’s NOT! Arrrghhh! I want my 1 hour of sleep back!!

spalugecarousel weekend

2007-02-26T14:27:00.001+08:00

Treated spider to some pampering for his birthday. Been eyeing the place myself, and I needed an excuse to spend all that money. Heeee.

It was a weekend of decadence. Too much food, too much fun. We’re now obviously back on earth, our work commitments looming ahead of us.

To my dearest spider.....
Happy birthday sayang. May this next year be the best yet...

cny hols

2007-02-21T18:58:00.000+08:00

Sprained my ankle playing captain’s ball. On an uneven grass field. In slippers. But it was great fun. My dearest cousin hilmy was practically mauled by us in our efforts to prevent him from catching the ball. Hahha.

As usual, east coast park was transformed into a malay village during the cny hols…and it’s amazing how ingenious we malays can be. We have tents of all shapes and sizes being erected here and there. And generators, GENERATORS mind you, for the lamps and the fans and the tvs that were brought along to the beach.

My aunt was the mastermind again for this year’s edition of the great charcoal fest. We had a total of 5 tents pitched (6-men tents at that), 1 gazebo-like tentage, 2 safari beds, god knows how many director chairs, and all these coming from the little storeroom of hers in pasir ris. Amazing how much stuff can be stuffed into that small hole.

And we had food galore. Satay, otak-otak, chicken wings, rojak char kway, roti john, mee hoon goreng, laksa, nasi lemak, pizza, cold potato salad, hot potato salad, epok-epok sayur, jemput-jemput pisang, jemput-jemput bawang, samosa, hot dogs. And there were oranges, oreos, chickadees, twisties, chocolate cake from polar, even sembuih hahha. Just thinking of the food is making me dizzy.

food galore

the laksa gravy..yummy yums!

We’ve started staying at cg more regularly now. We’re taking over the tenancy officially next week. Which leaves us with not much time. My folks n grandparents finally visited the place proper, and I have a feeling dad is grudgingly changing his opinion of the place. He had earlier said that the place look so kampong, and that he could easily get a better place for much lower at kembangan. But that’s precisely why we even got the place, cos we’ve fallen in love with the whole kampong environment that is cg. I cant believe it’s possible, but I’ve been waking up early in the morning to do the laundry and hang them out at the clothes line. Yes! The very idea of me missing sleep is unthinkable, but I wouldn’t want to miss the feel of wet grass on my feet early in the morning when i'm out hanging the clothes to dry. It’s just so…heavenly surreal. We were greeted by a small toad at our doorsteps the other day…yet another example of how kampong cg can be. Hv I said that I love the place? Heeee

Am finding it super difficult to come to work today. Thankfully, there’s a friend around to entertain me with her stories..hahha. and what do you know..the work day is over! Time to head home y’all!

2007-02-16T16:12:00.000+08:00

i did not pass out this time round

warm blood..anyone?

all wrapped up in green. i realise that there's some effort by the nurses at colour-coordination going on here. had sthg pink to go along wif my reddish-pink top the last time round..hehhe

it's a challenge getting my colleagues to join me for the donation. many are afraid of needles, or afraid of blood, or simply, just afraid. am supposed to organise one for the buidling tenants this year, but the way my colleagues are responding, we're prolly gonna get like a grand total of what?.....10 people perhaps? hahha

happy holidays y'all! am looking forward to 4 whole days of non-work. here's to charcoaled food, frolicking in the sun, a whole lot of hauling things around, and hopefully some zipping around on the bonneville :)

of soto and adams | mad jacks

2007-02-12T18:58:00.000+08:00

Had soto ayam after my gym workout just now, and my stomach’s still rumbling from all that chilli. Hadn’t had soto for the longest time. We’ve kind of decided not to patronize the mee soto stall at adams anymore. The food made spider sick 2 days before the wedding…hmmph! And the makcik never ever smiles. Funny how there’s always a queue for her food even though her service sucks, then again we were guilty of patronising her too despite her sulks and her curt way of dealing with customers. Not anymore though, not after the diarrhea!

But that doesn’t leave us with much choice. There’s really not much halal food on offer. You have the nasi lemak stall, the mee soto stall (out!), the rojak stall, the nasi ayam stall, the nasi padang stall (which is always closed by evening), the claypot stall (which I’ve never ever frequented…hmm why is that?), and countless Indian stalls selling the same fare. Errrr okay when I list them down like that it does look like a lot, but seriously, the options are not appetizing. Why is there no hor fun or char kway teow or stuffs like that? How come theres no laksa, or gado2? Or even chicken wings? YES why are there no bbq chicken wings sold there?? Any hawker centre worth its salt would sell bbq chicken wings, but there’s none there! And there’s no stall selling things to munch on, like goreng pisang or epok2.

If you feel like having western food, there’s an eatery across the road from adams. Our first taste of mad jack’s was there, a few months back. And we were far from impressed. There were many dirty dishes left on tables unattended, probably because the outlet was undermanned. Plus I just didn’t like the place, something about it that was missing, something I couldn’t place my finger on. We chanced upon another outlet at jalan kayu a few weeks back, and decided to give the eatery another try. Our verdict: the ambience here’s definitely better than the one at adams. I love the rustic, laid-back air that it exudes, probably cos its located in jalan kayu (in the middle of nowhere as some would have said) and not alongside the busy busy adam road. I love that the outlet’s occupying one corner of the row of shophouses, which means that it is able to have 2 open sides, instead of the usual 3 walls and 1 open side (for the entrance) that the other outlet and most other eateries have – makes it look more open, less claustrophobic. Food wise, it’s ok. Not great great, though they claim to serve the best fish & chips around. And the portion’s super small, was kinda expecting more for the money that I’m paying.

my fish & chips

his chicken burger

the jalan kayu outlet

we discovered a lovely little road very near the outlet, out of bounds to vehicles. decided to follow the road to walk off the oil-laden meal that we had, and what do you know, we came upon an lrt station that looks so out-of this-world i didnt even know it exists..hehhe! so now we know...if you ever want to go to the eateries at jalan kayu but have no transport of yr own to get there, just take the lrt to tanggam!

the lovely little road to.....tanggam lrt station!

2007-02-12T12:10:00.000+08:00

I left for work from cg this morning, and what do you know, I reached the office at 9! Of course this is something of a feat for me, being the 9.30 sorta girl that I am (hey I make it up by going back later. Come early leave early, come late leave late. D office is flexible like that)

Waking up in cg is like waking up in another country altogether. I love hearing the chirping of the birds, joined by the chorus of other early risers from the animal/insect kingdom that, I hear, puts up their full symphonic performance without fail every day of the year, even when it’s raining. I had doubts about the journey to work though. Needing a bus to take me to the train station to take me to town is not exactly very straightforward. Not as straightforward as walking to simei station n taking the train from there. But hey, i saw a lot more people (cute guys galore!), and apart from the annoying fact that it’s super hard trying to get onto a full train heading to town from newton, the journey to work’s pretty fine actually.

Am slowly assimilating myself to life in cg. We spent a good part of our weekend cleaning up the place. We’ve decided to just sleep there these few days, instead of going to cg after work, cleaning up, then going to simei to sleep. Mum was kinda sad that her girl’s moving away so soon, which was quite amusing actually, but I suppose I get where she’s coming from. I kinda miss having my brothers to disturb anytime I like too. But it’s impossible to really grow up until you’ve left the nest. Ah well.

Am going for my run now. tatas!

of girls & heroes & dramas galore

2007-02-02T19:32:00.000+08:00

Yeyy for the girls! Spider finds one of them too much of a nyonya for his liking..and I kinda agree. BUT they’ve gone that far and they’ve put their brains to good use (like taking a short cut to the entrance of the park after finishing their task instead of going back the way they came from!). being the first all-female team to win this in the history of the amazing race franchise, is no mean feat. So…congrats girls!

I nearly screamed in frustration at 1.30am in the morning when the episode ended in a cliffhanger. I was that hooked. And now I just cant cant cant wait to see the rest of the episodes. And I suspect that this time round, reading the recaps off television without pity won’t do. How on earth do ppl download their fave shows from the net ah?? I must learn!!

And why was I watching heroes at 1.30 in the morning when I could have watched it at 9? Cos there was something of far greater ‘importance’ happening roundabouts then. Yes, am referring to THAT match, the infamous one with plenty of tackles, plenty of falls, a dubious decision, and best of all, 17 looong minutes of nothing. Very the drama one. Yes it was a dubious decision by the referee to award that penalty, BUT this doesn’t give the thais d license to walk off the pitch and not continue wif the match. it’s a soccer match for god’s sakes. Dubious decisions are made all the time, but we don’t see teams walking off in protest everytime a decision goes against them! Totally appalling, that behaviour. And I’m amazed d referee allowed them to go that far. All this drama means one thing….a SUPERBLY CHARGED match on Sunday…n you’ll bet you I’ll be in front of d telly catching it in all its sandiwara glory.

Am hitting the gym in a while. Didn’t do my run during lunch cos I didn’t wana miss out on all the office gossip..hahhha. exercise still important lah but must spend time with colleagues during lunch too otherwise how to know the latest news/scandals in the office right? All that running has done me some good. Have managed to lose a few kilos already. At the rate I’m going…you think it’s possible to go back to my right-after-nus-days’ weight of 45kg? muakakakaka yeah in my dreams!

i MUST not be a bus

2007-01-30T18:34:00.000+08:00

Another 4km run. Another banana juice, this time mixed with carrot. And sliced fish soup for lunch.

I hope I can keep this up.

It’s amazing the things one can do for vanity. Hahha. I knew I had put on weight after the wedding. All those indulgent meals, and chocolates, and potatoes (I love potatoes!) mean extra kilos galore! And true enough, when I weighed myself at the start of the year, I’ve gained 2 kilos, and have crossed the 50kg threshold. Ah well, what’s 2 kilos right?

But I weighed myself again last Sunday. And horror of horrors, I’ve gained another 2 kilos! Am I officially fat??

And so I’ve no choice but to start exercising. Seriously of course. For I’ve ran on and off the last couple of weeks, but that didn’t seem to have worked out much. I have to exercise hard and lose those extra kilos, I HAVE to! There’s no way I want to prove my aunties right by gaining weight.

You see, every lady from my dad’s side of the family, and I mean EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM, gained weight, ie REALLY PILED ON THE FATS, after they got married. I’m not kidding. And my aunties have gleefully told me that I cant escape this fate of mine – it’s in the genes they say. So…I’m determined to prove them wrong. I MUST I MUST I MUST NOT BE A BUS – my fren’s constant mantra..hehhe…and mine too from now on.

So…. I’ll be running intensively now. and maybe I’ll start swimming again on weekends. I’m hoping that this wont fizzle out by the end of the week. And am hoping that I have more of my mum’s genes in me – she’s still very slim and pretty now, even if I say so myself.

I hope I can keep this up! Go bozy go!!

on a high

2007-01-29T15:56:00.000+08:00

Ran 4k during lunch n now I’m on a high. Got re-acquainted wif banana juice again after that. I love banana juice!! (but I love spider more..hehhe!)

Speaking of high…followed him on an odac trip to ubin 2 weeks ago. The last time I was there was for my obs trip…n that was like AGES ago. This time round, it was more of a ‘relek’ affair. N I absolutely loved cycling round d island…with its little kooky trails and all. Had myself a free mud spa session while I was there…thanks to d generous amount of mud that’s splattered/plastered all over my legs n feet

re-living our childhood days by playing pick-up sticks. even d sticks were old-school. i like!

the morning sky from my makeshift hammock

our breakfast at d coffeeshop just before the jetty. sells to-die-for kopi. really i'm not kidding.

a welcome sight after all that cycling. though we ended up not buying anything from there.

me n my bike

______________________________________________________________

me n my good frens met up last Friday evening for a catch-up cum bitching gossiping cum look-at-photos session last Friday at amirah’s grill. Great affordable food but lousy service, you’ve been warned yah. Sometimes we wonder why we even bother to keep in touch, all 5 of us, and I wonder myself too. but when we do, don’t you think we’re much the better for it? Yes we might not be terribly close anymore, but I sense that we can still depend on each other for support. No matter our flaws, I think it’d be too much of a shame to just let go of this. So I’m really glad that things turned out great that day. Here’s to our frenship gals!

And oh…even though I might have publicly dissed some of your wedding gifts, pls know that I’m in fact really touched by all the effort you gals hv put in getting n packaging those gifts. Really. So thank you gals…from d bottom of my heart :)

______________________________________________________________

It’s really a wonder how time flies. Had lunch with a colleague in town the other day..which was a rare event since we’ve both been posted to different outfits. He was talking abt his frustration wif the housing board..how he’d tried all the means to getting a new flat (balloting, walk-in, built to order) and failed…finding himself $40 poorer in the process. And I stopped him halfway and said “can you imagine, 5 years ago, when we were having lunch at roxy square, exchanging notes on the latest club haunts, the best diving sites and bitching of our boss and our dismal love life that 5 years on, we would be bitching abt the hdb??” it’s surreal. I look at him, and me, and thought that we pretty much looked the same. And yet, we’re not. Our circumstances are different. He’s now ready to be a father (a father!), and I’m somebody’s wife.

My point is? I donno. Blame it on the high from all that running…and all that banana juice. I love banana juice! And I love running! I love how it makes me feel. I love how it makes me look. Nothing can beat the glow of a person who’s just exerted herself. Then again, they say nothing can beat the glow of a pregnant woman. Hahha! Since I’m not pregnant, I’ll stick to getting my glow from exercising then.

I have tons more write about but I think I’ll stop for now. ciaos!

a passing | here's to life!

2007-01-16T17:17:00.000+08:00

He was the new guy at work. We exchanged smiles every time our paths met, but we never talked, partly because I as a rule never approach guys who are good-looking (stupid rule but you know me, always too embarrassed for nuts). But during the hustings, he was assigned to my group. And it was from there that we started talking. He found me familiar, we compared our past and realized we were jc mates, same batch, just a class apart. In fact, a friend of mine had a humungous crush on him back in jc, and it’s not difficult to see why. He turned out to be a really nice guy, and was really helpful during his brief time at the hustings. He was obviously proud of his wife and baby (yes he was already a father, and I wasn’t even married back then!) – had photos of them in his wallet which he would fish out without hesitation every time they were mentioned. From then on, we were like old friends, always teasing and bantering when we meet. He’s always teasing me about the sex talks that I had to give (the virgin sex expert he would call me), and I’m always calling him the handsome boy. We promised to keep in touch when he left for a better job, but like all busy people, we never did. And now we never will, for he passed away last Sunday.

He was my age. So young, so fit, in the prime of his life. But he woke up early that Sunday morning feeling breathless, and he passed away soon after, from heart seizure. To his wife and kid (and another along the way) – my deepest sympathies. I cannot imagine how it is like being in their shoes, but I hope that they’ll be able to cope with their loss and move on eventually.

As a colleague aptly put it, “his passing has left us with the sobering message of not taking our lives for granted and the importance of making each day count, wherever we are and whoever we are with”.

So….here’s to life!

On that note, I’m pleased to share with you photos of that happy milestone in my life. It’s been exactly one month to the day, and I’ve enjoyed every single day of it. Here’s to many more happy days to come!

2007-01-12T15:17:00.000+08:00

This is me wif the new do. Heya! Went to a salon near home on the way back from work last Wednesday. Decided to just go ahead with it cos I was going nowhere with my ‘research’..kuakuakua. my colleagues are all useless cos they’re the kind to keep long hair…so when I ask them for recommendations they’d all stare blankly at me…n most times their response would be…”why you dowan to keep your hair???” Which is perplexing cos it’s not like as if I’ve not cut my hair before….i did that 5 months before my wedding! But that hair cut wasn’t satisfying…I felt that my hair was still too thick..not short enough. My third day into the new do, and I must say I’m pretty happy with the result. It’s layered all over, and amazingly it’s managed to stay in place without the help of wax/gel/spray! And I don’t even have to blow my hair! I love this ruffled messy look of mine hehhe

Ok enough of hair already!

The weekend is coming yeyy. They’ve never been so precious to me before as they are now. Side-effect from being married, you think? People have been asking me how it feels like being married. Well..to be honest..it feels like hard work. I have to suddenly grow up and be all disciplined and responsible. For instance, now I make my bed without fail every morning, when before I’d have happily left my bed in the sorry state that it was. And though I’m still living with my parents, I’ve resolved to do all the laundry (mine and his) myself. Which is prolly not that big a deal to some of you but hey…to me it’s hard work yah.

I love the fact that we can go home together and not go our separate ways though. I love that we can hold hands and hug and be lovey dovey in public without fear of being caught. I love waking up with him by my side every morning. And I love our ‘exercise’ sessions! So yah…despite all that hard work, I’m not complaining....heeee :-)

itching to chop

2007-01-09T17:08:00.000+08:00

i'm itching itching itching to chop off my hair. but where can i get one which cn suit my face ah? it seems that only long hair suits me...n the last time i had my hair cut it wasnt fantastic and i ended up bunning my hair not long after even tho it was still rather short. i wantwaNtWANT to cut my hair!! recommendations anyone?

some of u girls hv been bugging me abt my pics...patience pls. my pics r like so huge so i'm now reformatting them. will post them once i'm done. but i'm so busy wif wifely activities (hurhur) nowadays that i dont have time to do these things. anyway..i'm only in here cos i just hv to blab abt my unbelievable urge to chop off my hair. i wanna do it properly this time...so must do research first. hv always been doing my hair at this place near d office...but truth be told the stylists there r all quite lian...and though they're nice i dont think their skills are anything to shout abt. SO must do research lah. dont mind paying a bit more cos i REALLY want my short do to work this time. but i'm so impatient that i have a feeling i'll just go ahead and do it later after work! howhowhow???

i wanna chop my hair!

new year, new beginning

2007-01-02T02:01:00.000+08:00

heyhey
so it’s the 2nd day of the new year. Happy new year y’all!

MY new year though began a few weeks ago. New year, new life, new beginning.
What a rush!

There was some uncertainty over our tenancy at cg, seeing that there was a looong waiting list for the place, but the lady boss gave us a great wedding gift 2 days before our wedding by finally agreeing to our request. Yeyy! We actually took time off our wedding preps to drop by her office and speak to her personally, and were we glad we did that! I suppose perseverance does pay off, and if one really puts one’s mind to it then nothing is out of our reach. And of course it wouldn’t have been possible without HIS blessings…Alhamdulillah..

The 2 days were a success. Saturday’s weather was great, which suited us fine as we were zipping here and there. On Sunday, we were blessed with showers of rain, which also suited us fine cos we had nowhere to go. Alhamdulillah, the guests didn’t stay away despite the rain.

We went for our short trip to bali for some r&r. Why bali? Cos we wanted to spend some quality time together – eating, swimming, snogging (hehhe!), just lazing around doing nothing basically. And spending money on a trip to someplace far doesn’t make much sense if our itinerary for the trip is doing nothing. Was actually flirting with the idea of going to Thailand, but we’ve been to many of the places there already, and I’ve never done bali, so bali it was. (I’d personally recommend phuket or krabi and phiphi for honeymooners if they’ve never been there before – great place, friendly people and loads of halal food to eat). But bali is still great to me becos of the loads of us time that we had.

We had the wedding party soon after – a small do (successfully planned and executed by his group of super-able, creative, helpful and friendly students), mostly for his colleagues and students. My close grp of friends were invited as well, and I’m most thankful and happy that they were there. We had fun didn’t we girls? :P

The photos are ready, and I’m mighty pleased with the results. Shouldn’t have spent those countless hours surfing the net for good journalistic photographers when I have them right under my nose! Will upload the pics in good time yah

The dust has settled, the euphoria of the last few weeks will ebb, and soon we’ll be going back to work. I cant wait to get on with our lives proper, without the dazzle. Wish the 2 of us the best yah!

embarking on a journey

2006-12-16T02:53:00.000+08:00

I’ve never had inai on my hands in all my years of existence, until today. And I hate the end result. But I tell myself not to sweat over these things. In 12 hours’ time, I’ll be embarking on a journey with my best friend, my soulmate, my love. And THAT is something to look forward to.

May the next 2 days run smoothly for us and our families
May our union receive HIS blessings
And may our marriage kekal hingga ke syurga
Amin ya rabbal alamin

ramblings – end

2006-12-12T00:53:00.000+08:00

I rambled quite a bit didn’t i? I suppose back then I was bitter cos I was still without a proper job after months of searching. I’m pretty amazed at how some of the things I’ve said then reflect exactly how i'm feeling now. Like my sentiments on marriage, and how mine would be like. Apart from the white fluffy wedding dress (which is so yesterday), all my other thoughts and dreams on that subject remain the same. And I’m praying they’ll come true..insyaAllah.

That girl seven years ago cant wait for life to grab her by the shoulders and sweep her off. She was disappointed and bitter that things back then didn’t go as planned. Throughout those seven years, she has experienced love, heartache, hopelessness, success, recognition, wild adventure, depression, the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.

Seven years on, this same girl has a renewed sense of confidence, and an assured sense of self. I like this new her, and I wish her all the best.

ramblings of an unwilling bummer 2

2006-12-12T00:45:00.000+08:00

My 2 good friends are getting married on my birthday, and I feel terrible. Yup, I feel terrible. And if I feel terrible, does that make me a bad friend?

It’s just that I cant believe that 2 of my friends, and of course they’re both as old as me, are getting married. I mean, aren’t we a bit too young to be getting married? They’re only 22 now, 23 when they get married. Can you imagine the tones of things that one can do at that age? To give up your freedom just when one is given freedom is unthinkable to me. There I was, being under my parents’ care for at least 18 years. Then, when I reach 18, they began to realize that hey! I am big enough and mature enough to take care of myself. So then I was given freedom, albeit a bit only. Then when I’ve finally completed school, I gain another kind of freedom – the freedom to spend my money on whatever I want. I now have financial independence. It’s time to enjoy life man! It’s time to have fun! But it’s definitely not time to settle down and get married.

Marriage is not something to be taken lightly. At least that’s what my parents always say. And my religion sees marriage as something of an institution. It is the responsibility of those in my religion to get ourselves marred and propagate. The main aim here is to populate the world, an to keep it populated. And sure that sounds heavy, but I’m actually looking forward to it. I’m looking forward to the whole idea of getting married, and staying married for the rest of my life. But the thing is, I don’t want to get married when I’m 23. No way hosay!

Yah, don’t mistake me. I’ve been dreaming about getting married all my life. I dream about meeting that perfect man, of wearing the white, fluffy wedding dress. I dream of all these.

But I not only dream of getting married, but also of being married I dream about the kind of married life I would have. I dream of waking up every morning with the man I love by my side. I dream of having someone for me to hold and hug. I dream of us having fun together, and helping each other out when we’re in trouble. I dream of having kids of our own I dream of nurturing my kids with my husband, and of both of us having our hands full dealing with our kids. I dream of the time when I can sit back with my husband and reminisce over old times.

As I grow older, I think of other aspects of married life. I dream of the freedom I would have once I’m married to touch my husband anytime I want to. I dream of the time when I would lose my virginity. I dream of having sex. I dream of the tenderness and the love that I have so much to give, and the tenderness and love that I will receive.

I dream.

Of course I know that life is no bed of tulips. My marriage I’m pretty sure will not be smooth-sailing throughout. I know there will be hiccups along the way. I would probably get mself into terrible fights with my husband. And when that happens, we might not even speak for days. But I know that my marriage will work. I just know it! The question of divorce has never been on my mind, even though I know the divorce rate for my community is the highest here. I know that a lot of my friends, especially the more liberal ones, do not believe in the institution of marriage. What’s the point of getting married, they reasoned, when one is only going to end up in divorce anyway?

Well, that’s them. Me, I’ve never thought about it. I’m surrounded by happy couples, by happy close-knit families. And that is why I’m not afraid of marriage. Why I’m looking forward to it. But that still doesn’t make me feel less terrible abut the prospect of my 2 friends getting married.

It’s not that I’m not happy for my two friends. I am. But I still feel terrible when I know that they’re getting married on my birthday. Why must they get married on my birthday? Why MY birthday? As if I’m not feeling miserable enough. Oh I know. I know what people would say. Hellooo dear little missy….does the world revolve around you??? Yes I know. Of course the world does not revolve around me. And of course my 2 friends have perfectly good reasons why they want to be married on that day. Like the fact that my birthday falls on a Sunday next year. And the fact that the weekend of my birthday happens to be the first weekend of the school holidays. But I still feel terrible.

Why do I feel terrible? Hellooo. Isn’t it obvious enough?? I feel terrible because I am jealous. Yes jealous. Jealous that each of my 2 friends has someone who actually wants to spend the rest of his life with her, while I don’t. jealous that they have someone who cherishes and loves them, while I don’t. jealous that they’re going ahead in their journey of life with someone by their side, while I trudge alone. Yes, jealous. Plain and simple I’m JEALOUS!

Oh please. Why do I want to be jealous of my friends? They are my friends after all aren’t they? I’m supposed to be happy for them. And I am happy for them. Really I am. I’ll only be wishing the best for them, and I sincerely hope that they’ll be happy always. But I still feel terrible. Terrible because I know that while there are people out there being happy, I am but one pathetic sad creature. I’m happy for them, true, but I definitely am not happy myself.

I guess the fact that the weddings will be held on my birthday sort of rubs the salt into my already open wound. I know that I’d be feeling miserable that day. Turning a year older is never a happy occasion. One has to deal with the all-important question: what have I done this past year? Or the more important question: what have I been doing with my life all these years? These are definitely tough questions. And the thing is, not only are the questions tough, they have pretty unpalatable answers as well. I hate thinking about my life. There’s really nothing much I can say about it. Given the chance to assess myself on my very own report card, I would say that I’m a flop. Really.

Ok ok. Some of you would probably be exasperated with me. Ok fine. I do admit that academically-speaking, I’m doing ok. I do have that elusive bachelor degree in hand, but then again, what good is the degree anyway? Am I employed? NO! So there!

ramblings of an unwilling bummer

2006-12-12T00:41:00.000+08:00

I am a fresh graduate. Yes, fresh. Right out of the woods, or in this case, the mass of buildings way yonder at the ridge (kent ridge actually..hehhee). But sometimes I wonder whether I should use the word ‘fresh’ to describe myself. After all, I’m not exactly fresh right? I have officially been out of school for 6 months. Now, we wouldn’t call that fresh would we?

But come to think of it, I wouldn’t want to think of myself as ‘stale’ either. Hmm…’stale’…that word somehow gives me such negative vibes. I think the most appropriate word to use here would be a combination of those 2 words. So, I guess I’m what you people call (or at least what I would personally call) a ‘freshly-stale’ graduate.

I’ve never thought I would be unemployed, but well…here I am, an unwilling bummer. I cringe everytime I hear the label ‘bummer’ being given to me. But hey! I’m not a bummer by choice ok. It’s not as if I’m not doing anything right now. I’m on an all-out search for a permanent job.

It’s kind of funny when I talk about my situation on the net. Way back when I first started chatting, I always introduce myself as someone who’s still schooling, and somehow, that kind of gave me an existence. You know how people always start their conversations with mundane lines. Here’s a sampling of the kind of chats I get myself into..

Guy : hello
Me : hallo
Guy : intro
Me : for wat?
Guy : so that we can know each other better
(or)
for fun
(or)
I want to at least have an idea who I’m chatting with (I like this line by the way)
(or)
guy : ok ok…I’ll start first (which is the best way to start. After all, it’s the gentlemanly way of doing things)
guy : 26/m…..u?
me : oh….me 22f
guy : ohh….work?
me : nope
guy : school where?
Me : nope…not skooling
Guy : then wat? Housewife ah?

Don’t you think that’s bloody irritating? People are either schooling or working, and if not, they’re being the good housewife – staying at home obediently and looking after the house and the kids.

Chatting now is always exciting cos I love to see how the people I chat with react to my answers. I’m a very truthful person (though god knows why I want to be truthful on the net. Everybody else lies I bet..but noo…not me. I’m very naïve hah?) Anyway, since I’m so truthful and all, I cant help but tell them the truth about myself. So way back when I was still an undergrad, I tell people that I’m still studying. And if they were to ask for details, I’ll give it to them, and I’ll always have instant reactions after making that disclosure. Either they’d still be interested to talk to me (prolly cos they feel that they’re on ‘par’ with me.them being undergrads or equivalent), or they’d drop me instantly like a hot potato (reasoning out that they don’t like talking to intelligent girls).

Anyway, now that I’ve graduated and all, I cannot possibly say that I’m still schooling can i? so I usually say I’m a bummer. And whoa! The responses I get are all good! These guys would immediately feel that they’re better than me (not consciously of course), and thus would begin a conversation in which they would be advising me on what to do and all. At the end of it all I always get their contact numbers (I didn’t ask for it!). Somehow being a bummer upped my attraction yah….hehhe!

ramblings – start

2006-12-12T00:34:00.000+08:00

my room’s been turned upside down and now it’s in a dreadful mess. I’ve been clearing my cupboard of manymany things, and I’m amazed at how cold I’ve become, the way I’ve been throwing away my things. But one has to be cold if one wants to have some control over the things one owns, right? We own our things yah…not the other way round. So yes…into the bin they go!

Chanced upon my scribblings done on scraps of paper. I’m amazed I still have them, yet thankful that I have them still. They remind me of the person I was back then, and how different she is from the person I am today. Or am I still the same? These scribblings were done in the later part of 1999, when I had too much time in my hands temping around while waiting for that elusive first job.

I need a break from the wedding madness, so I’ll be spending the next few minutes/hours typing these scribblings down just so I could capture them for posterity. Happy reading!

triumph

2006-12-06T00:31:00.000+08:00

its 1216 in the morning and i'm still at the office. yupyup. i've got tons of work to do, and i've got only 1 more day left to clear it before i go on leave. which leaves me with not much time. i have a sinking feeling that i'll have to drop in the office occasionally to complete them. thing is, even when i'm done with them, there's still the follow-up to do. bleah.

there was some sandiwara over my preps last weekend. i dont seem to have any say over what i want or dont want. i've decided to just go ahead with what they want. i'm disappointed with them...yes. but i also know that i shd not sweat over these things. ah well.

on a good note....we got the triumph bonneville last week! i'm no biker chick, but i couldnt stop grinning everytime i'm on it. now we're stuck with the happy problem of deciding between the bonneville and the swift everytime we need to zip around...hehhe.

ok gotta go!

i must learn to be deaf to people’s comments

2006-11-23T17:04:00.000+08:00

When it comes to an event as big and as important as a wedding, people close to you (and those not so close) are bound to be offering their advice and comments on practically everything. From the duit hantaran to the hantaran gifts to the wedding deco and the food and the bedroom furniture and the bedroom décor and the mak andam and the clothes you wear – nothing is safe.

Relatives have sky-high expectations of the coming wedding. So they can’t understand when my duit hantaran is a supposedly lowly figure, not of ‘market-rate’ for grads. They can’t understand when an unknown, non-branded mak andam is chosen for the wedding. They can’t understand when we choose to be laissez-faire with the wedding, and not go over the top with expenses. They don’t understand all that. What they understand is that this is a grad marrying a grad…so our wedding MUST be grand! And so when I disappoint them in this aspect, they make comments (jokingly they might add), but comments which when heard are hurtful still.

There are many things to your wedded life than the wedding. The wedding is just the start – there’s still the marriage and your years together as a couple to look forward to. There’ll be many many many occasions to spend on, and spending a bomb on a wedding just does not make sense.

One should be praised for being practical instead of ridiculed for being thrifty. Forget the praise – just be happy for us. Share in the joy. Pray that our marriage will last, our years together happy ones.

I must learn to be deaf to people’s comments.

that night wif a Star

2006-11-19T13:53:00.000+08:00

We got invites to a party last Friday.

And we decided to go cos of the deliciously dreamy, and superbly talented ryan star of rockstar supernova fame. Spider had been following the show religiously, choosing to follow this talent show rather than the sometimes yawn-inducing singapore idol show, which was also shown on Wednesday nights. I was hooked on from the later episodes, and ryan (and toby!) were my favourites right from the start. Hands up those who were disappointed with the eventual winner – Lukas? Anyways, I suppose things turned out well for ryan in the end, cos he got to pursue a solo career (which he’s so suited for) and fans love him already (he’s rockstar supernova fan favourite for goodness’ sake!).

Back to the launch party. The 2 male VJs who were hosting the show were great, but the rest of the VJs were just so-so. They didn’t seem to have the presence to hold the crowd, and I thought the only thing going for them were their looks. Like I said, the 2 male VJs hosting the show were great. Little wonder then that they were the ones hosting the show, and not the others.

There were other performers at the party – hady mirza, rivermaya, an ah lian and a rapper prancing about on stage, and paul twohill (not part of the programme, but he was walking here and there, practically working the floor, you’d think he’s part of the show. Oh and he actually went on stage to take part in a game, and the VJs had no inkling as to who he was…hahahhha poor soul).

But it was obvious that the main draw was ryan. His was the last performance of the party, and the wait was worth it cos he was sooooooo meltingly goooOOooooOOOood.

And the best thing of the night was…..we got to take pictures with him! Yeyy!

A bit blur cos it's taken wif the fonecam...but I’m one happy camper :D